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Savvy November 2019

Wedding crashers

Imamanda12, on October 21, 2019 at 9:37 AM Posted in Wedding Ceremony 0 7

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My fiancé is in the military and all of his close friends he’s invited from work have been talking about the wedding and how excited they are for it. Some other people he works with overheard and are now mad about not getting an invite. We wanted to keep the guest count small so we only invited his closest friends and their spouses/significant other that we regularly hang out with outside of work. Now those not invited people are saying if they don’t get an invite they are going to crash the wedding. His friends invited are saying they will kick people out and help us out if they do. I’m just worried about altercations especially as the night goes on and they have been drinking. Although all of his friends are really good people and I don’t think they would do anything to mess up the wedding I would like to have the peace of mind knowing I won’t have to deal with the crashers. Does anyone have any suggestions on what to do about this? The ceremony will be outside and we will have a plated dinner in the reception hall. My fiancé is really stressing about it and I’m starting to do the same! Thanks in advance!

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7 Comments

Latest activity by Meghan, on October 21, 2019 at 12:59 PM

Super December 2021
Alyssa · on October 21, 2019 at 9:41 AM
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Does the venue provide security? Do you have a wedding planner? I would assign some people who know the most guests faces to be on top of this in case it happens.
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Master January 2015
null · on October 21, 2019 at 9:41 AM
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The nerve of some people, I would be livid. Is there anyway you could hire security? I would hate for your invited guests to have to get involved with the wedding crashers. You could hire an off-duty police officer to handle the situation so that you and your friends don't have to get involved and can enjoy the wedding.
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Master May 2019
Cyndy · on October 21, 2019 at 10:38 AM
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People are so rude. I would look into having someone act as a “bouncer/security” if you really think this is a potential. That’s not something you want to have to worry about in your wedding day. And maybe have your FH tell those people if they come they will be asked to leave by this “security” person. Maybe that’s enough to stop them from coming.
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VIP November 2019
Catherine · on October 21, 2019 at 11:28 AM
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WOW. I really do hope these people are not serious. I just can't get over how entitled some people can be. You are hard working people paying for your wedding. don't they understand you can't afford to invite every single person you've met?! I don't think its fair to put that type of pressure on someone - especially when they work with him!!! I would suggest talking to the venue and giving them a heads up - see what they can work out for you.
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Expert November 2020
Shelby · on October 21, 2019 at 11:39 AM
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I agree, if you have a coordinator or someone who would be able to keep an eye out on people’s faces from the very beginning and know most of those faces, then when the crashes do show up (if they actually go through with it) then they’ll know those are the ones they need to kick out. Good luck 😊
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VIP November 2016
Tara · on October 21, 2019 at 11:43 AM
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First of all, take a deep breath and relax! It will be absolutely fine!!! They should be more mature about it and realize not everyone can be invited to a wedding. You have to draw the line somewhere. If you're not close to them, they need to get over it. It's rude to even make the suggestion that they'd crash your wedding. However, what i would say is even if they do, so what?! I doubt they would honestly. But, don't stress yourself out about it. I am certain there won't be any major altercations. Your husband's friends will handle any unwanted guests I'm sure. And I know they'd respect your wishes and do it in a polite manner. But, if the people really did show up, I'm sure they wouldn't do it until well into the reception, after dinner and all the big things happen, and they'd probably just come to dance and hang out. And if that's the case, it's not a big deal. Just focus on yourself and your husband and everything else will work out!
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Master October 2019
Meghan · on October 21, 2019 at 12:59 PM
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I would hope these people are kidding about crashing your wedding. However, if they are not, this would be a job for your planner/DOC/event staff. I would them know that people have discussed "crashing". They will know how to deal with this situation if it arises.
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