Wedding Crashers!?

I would hire security for your wedding if this is a major concern. You shouldn't have to tell your friends anything about him not being welcome. If he doesn't receive an invitation, he's not welcome.

Hopefully none of your worst fears will actually happen (I think somebody has to be incredibly gutsy/rude to actually "crash" a wedding they weren't invited to...), but since you're required to have security anyway, I'd just give them a heads up -- probably including photos -- of anyone you are concerned might show up uninvited and make it clear they are to be removed from the premises immediately. If there are family members or close friends who are aware of the situation, I'd also ask them to let security know immediately if they see any uninvited guests on the premises. Finally, I'd probably try to maintain some control/privacy regarding the wedding details (e.g., password protect your website, don't post about date/time/venue or other details on social media, etc.). If some of your close friends are actually pushing to include these people, I'd have a frank conversation with them and make sure they are clear you do NOT want certain people at the wedding and you expect your friends' support in making sure they are not there. (If you have close friends who would willing go behind your back to get someone in that they KNOW you do not want at the wedding, I would seriously rethink that friendship.) Good luck!

I honestly would not worry. Just because he said he wants to come does not mean that he plans to crash. I have wanted to attend certain celebrations but never even thought to just show up. Do you feel this person is that impulsive to do so. Unless your friends bring it up again just say that the wedding guest list has been set and due to budget you and the FH do not want to add more people. If you feel it will be a concern then maybe family can help escort him out or hire security.

I think honestly you are wedding stressed. It is normal. It is a big day so we worry about the what ifs. I personally do not feel you should let this stress you rather have a plan B just in case and then have a glass of wine and relax.

I wouldn't stress about it now, a lot can change in a year. When time gets closer, I'd alert security of who you don't want there (with pictures & names) so they can spot them. Then quietly alert close family & friends so they can tell security if they see them.

Regarding what you've heard that he "knows he screwed up and wants to be friends again," I'd look at it as, if he really feels that way, he could reach out to you and apologize, and, if you're open to it, he could invite you to start spending time together again, completely SEPARATE from your wedding.... Your wedding is still a year away, so if he really wants to "mend the friendship," he has plenty of time to attempt to do so. It was a very different situation, but there was a couple we'd been close with for years, and their daughter was best friends with our daughter. Despite going to college and then living on opposite sides of the country, the girls have remained close. Our daughter asked their daughter to be one of her MOHs. However, several years ago, the parents went through a bunch of drama -- it was a mess. Eventually, they reconciled, but after they did, they completely cut off contact with us (my husband had tried to be a good friend to the husband, and as a result probably knew too much about their "dirty laundry"). Anyway, we hadn't heard a word from them in a good 4-5 years, despite our having tried to reach out for a while before we realized they were actively ignoring us. As soon as their daughter was going to be in our daughter's wedding, the mom started contacting me regarding how "they couldn't wait to see their daughter stand up with our daughter...." The guest list was limited to our huge family and THE B&G's FRIENDS, so they weren't ever on the list (plus they hadn't talked with us in four years...). The mom went so far as to ask if she could "crash the rehearsal" so she could watch that, since they weren't invited to the wedding.... It was so weird! I just told her, unfortunately, that won't work out.... As soon as the wedding was over, I haven't heard another word from her. They just wanted to come to the wedding to spend time with their daughter & her boyfriend who live across country and rarely visit.... Not doing that at our daughter's wedding! If they truly wanted to be friends again, they've had plenty of opps.... Hang in! People can be really weird about weddings!

I agree with giving photos to security and my take? These fools are full of hot air - they are trying to mess with you. They are not gonna crash. Best wishes!!!

My ex was bugging me about a month before the wedding saying that I needed to tell him I was getting married and became very scary after that often times checking into places near my work and other creepy things. I spoke to a few of my family members who were aware of his manipulative and abusive ways and had them watch out for him just incase. The night went off without a hitch, thankfully!!! I was super scared but so relieved that I had extra people watching out for him.