Wedding ceremony after secret courthouse marriage.

Honestly lying about being married isn't the best way to start a marriage especially if someone would find out because they would like then end up telling everyone else. Is there a reason you want to keep this a secret from everyone instead of being honest?

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We plan on telling our immediate family and close friends, we just mostly don't see a point to telling people like aunts, uncles, and others. We aren't the type of people to share are lives with everyone, just very private people. We don't really see it as lying, more so avoiding having to focus our wedding day on comments like "why didn't you just wait", "I'm sad I missed the real thing" and so on.

View Quoted Comment If you are telling immediate family and close friends then it's bound be shared by then even if it's on accident. There really is no point on keeping it from people because even if you don't see it as lying others likely will because at the end of the day you are lying regardless of how you see it.

I answered your question. But I also warned you how others will feel. It's not my fault you are taking what I said as nasty. Good luck to you.

You can't tell people how to post - you asked a question on a public forum (that gets asked a LOT on here) - and Veronica answered, whether you like her answer or not. (You're probably also going to discover that your plan is extremely unpopular here.)

If you don't care how others see it, then be up front about being married - and whether *you* see it as a lie or not, it is a lie of omission - and people get very upset when they inevitably (especially since it looks like it's a *year* until your celebration of marriage) find out that your event was not actually your wedding.

Having said that - the direct answer to your question is no - if your officiant does the ceremony precisely as they would if you were not married, then they could lose their license. There are parts you can still do (vows, etc.) but they cannot pronounce you, you cannot sign your license, etc.

Thank you for everyone's input, I'm no longer looking for answers to my question.

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I have a different answer than those who have already commented.

My Husband and I got legally married on a day that was special and important to us, then had a large wedding a few weeks later. We only told our immediate families about getting married already, and then did a regular ceremony at the big wedding. No one knew we were already married and no one questioned. No one cares about actually watching you sign the marriage certificate. Weddings should be about celebrating love, not a legal document.

We did tell everyone as it came up AFTER the big wedding. I shared photos from our marriage day and our big wedding day on social media (clear difference since I wore a different dress!), mentioned in conversation we had actually gotten married weeks prior, etc. And NO ONE cared. Do whatever you want and feels right to you.

And the reasoning was the same for us. We didn't want to tell people and get comments about the big wedding not being special/real/etc. Everyone had an awesome time at the big wedding, and now everyone knows that isn't our "real" anniversary. Literally no one cares, they were just excited to celebrate with us.

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The part about the officiant not being able to do the ceremony is absolutely not true, except in certain religious cultures. An officiant cannot "lose their license" for doing public speaking, which without the legal document is what a wedding ceremony is. Certain churches may not allow a ceremony if you're legally married already, but there is no license legality at play here.

Even having done exactly what OP is asking for advice for, I do agree with other parts of your comment but just want to make sure misinformation isn't being taken as true.