Wedding called off... help

Sounds like you need to cut your losses, because this relationship is toxic. He is way too easily steered by his family, and that will only continue to cause issues down the road. And he is stringing you along by claiming "he loves you but isn't in a good place right now." Sorry, but that is BS. If he truly loved you whole heartily, then nothing would come in the way of that. I know it's probably hard, but I truly think your best bet would be to move on. Normally I like to suggest couples counseling, but it sounds like y'all are a younger couple and need more time to figure your own lives & goals out before really committing to someone. Good luck, and so sorry all this is happening. Hang in there and listen to your head on this one (not your heart).

End it... Don't waste your time on someone who doesn't support you. If you were meant to be his wife then he should have your back and defend you to his family. He says hes not in a good place.. what does that mean? You sound like an intelligent woman and you have worked hard to get where you are (nursing school is no joke) your husband should be your biggest cheerleader and supporter. Sounds like this guy and his family make your life more stressful... The man you are meant to spend your life with will make you feel more important and you will never have to question their love for you

Outside influences have tried to tear my fiancé and I apart, but we talked and never let them drive a wedge between us. If he couldn't do that for you, then he isn't the one for you. He was in a relationship with you, not his family, and he should know better than them what is best for the two of you. If he is relying on their opinion without taking the responsibility of making his own then he has told you what you need to know. I'm so sorry you're going through this but I do hope it is a short setback before something truly amazing and worth it comes into your life.

Agree with PP, cut your losses.

Also agree with him too, why would a Kirk Cameron movie help him or change things? That seems like a kinda immature idea.

Hopefully you'll grow and move on and find the perfect person for you. You have tons of time.

End it....imagine having this kind of drama for the next 50 years. No thank you, you deserve so much more than that!

Well, he's right. A movie is not going to help. I know you may be feeling like he's "the one," but I'm getting so many red flags from the little bit I've read. The RIGHT one is out there, so don't keep chasing the WRONG one.

You are correct. He is throwing your relationship away because of his family. And he is showing you exactly how he feels about you by stringing you along and keeping you a secret like he is. He can tell you he loves you till he's blue in the face. Doesn't mean anything, because his actions tell the truth. Know your worth, and trust your brain / gut on this one....that is what you do.

I have experience being with someone with toxic family members so I wanted to add my two cents in.. if my fiance kicked me out of our home and decided I did not love him because his family felt that way, I would be heartbroken but I would never talk to him again. I have had some truly insane conversations/ situations with his family members.. especially when we began dating. Even at 15/16 years old during the first few years of our relationship, my fiance had my back. always. He stood up for me and made sure I knew that. His parents love me now because he made it clear that I was not going anywhere and they would not treat me the way that they did or they would be out of both of our lives. My fiance and I are very religious and share the same beliefs and one of those beliefs is that your spouse is #1. Anyone who didn't seem to understand that has been put in their place by him. It is 100 % on him to defend you and he didn't. He has made it clear that even if he got back together with you, his parents would always have a bigger influence on him than you would.. he values their feelings more than yours and that toxicity will only hurt you. You deserve someone who chooses you and makes it clear to not only you, but everyone else in their lives, that you are #1.

Leave now. He is hiding you? Lying to his family about seeing you? LISTEN TO YOURSELF. Cut all ties, block his number and get the heck out Dodge. Do not allow him to talk you into going into counseling or anything - he is toxic abuser.

If he's trying to hide you from his family, that's a major red flag. Cut him off completely! I'm sorry you're having to go through this