Wedding anxiety

I am crying nonstop over this and have so much anxiety to the point I want to cancel the wedding. Long story short, my family doesn’t get along, mainly because my mom continues to hold a grudge and hates my extended family ( for good reasons). However that was the past and I forgave but didn’t forget. BOTH sides of my family caused the issues. My cousins can’t be invited to the wedding due to my mom and them hating each other and not talking. My parents paid for a lot of the wedding and refuses to come if my cousins come. My cousins are upset because they can’t come and basically want to stop talking to me because of the distance and drama my mom has been causing in the family. I have a lot of resentment with my mother because she is narcissistic, holds grudges and starts problems for no reason holding onto past issues. If my mom doesn’t come that means my little sisters (who are the flower girls) don’t come and I need to have my mom, dad and sisters at my wedding. I can’t imagine it without them. But a part of me has so much hurt because I wish my cousins can go. I have no family going because it was all destroyed due to the past and the consequences of my mother lay onto me. Now my cousins don’t really want a relationship with me because they don’t see a point in it since they can’t really see me, invite me to important things in their life or get invited to important things in my life. I have tried to talk to my mom MANY times and there is no getting to her or changing her mind. She is set on her ways. I went to my cousins wedding last year and my mom found out and flipped out. I am 27 years old, have a home with my fiancé and financially support myself. She gifted part of the wedding to us. I had so much anxiety even going to my cousins wedding and I don’t even know how she found out. I am scared my mother will keep me away from my little sisters and I am basically the only family they have. That’s why i let her walk all over me. I am crying my eyes out writing this. I don’t even have anyone to plan a shower because I have no friends, no aunts or grandmas or cousins to plan it. My mom is even making me feel guilty for planning it for me when I told her to not do it. I don’t even want this wedding anymore