Wedding announcement / Thank you cards

I don't necessarily think it would look gift grabby. I definitely think it's a nice thought, I'm just not sure what the best delivery would be. These don't seem like groups of people that would typically expect to be invited to a wedding- but perhaps you could tell them in person over coffee or lunch? I have a family member who sends out a letter around Christmas each year, just highlighting what's been going on in their lives, and wishing everyone a happy New year- perhaps going that route would be more acceptable? It would be far enough after your wedding that it wouldn't seem like a thank you card for a wedding they weren't invited to, but you could also personalize each one, and say how important they are to you? I'm not sure! I do like the thought behind it though- everyone likes to feel appreciated!

Yeah... if they're not good enough for an Invite I'd just let it go.

I would really side eye someone if they did not invite me to their wedding but wrote me a card telling me how awesome I am. Like do you want a post-wedding gift?

Nope to that. Nooope.

I've always read that wedding announcements (sent after the wedding, of course) don't come with the expectation of a gift, but as PPs have noted, they can be taken as gift-grabby, apparently.

I think the sentiment is sweet, and heavily considered mailing announcement cards out, but word gets around fast enough via social media these days.

ETA: After re-reading the post about wording it as a thank you card - I'd probably nix that idea, and just stick with a, "Hey, we're married now!" type of deal.

Yeah, if I received that I would be really confused. I like Stephanie's idea of a letter around Christmas so it's not so close to the wedding.

The thought is nice but I'm not sure that's the best execution. If those people are important to you then tell them that. If you never see them or would feel weird asking them to coffee, they probably don't need a thank you. Lots of special people in the world

I think the discomfort that some people are feeling may come from the fact that few people use social correspondence at all anymore. Other than you wedding invitations and thank-you notes, when was the last time you mailed a note of any sort to anyone?

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/31/wedding-announcement_n_5064483.html

You could mail them a standard announcement and add a handwritten note of thanks for the role they played in your life.

I would skip sending thank you's to everyone, but it might be nice to send one to that professor, especially if you haven't kept in touch and he/she doesn't know you're getting married!

As the person who introduced the two of you, I'm sure they'd love to hear that you're still together and now, married!

That's a no. If these people are so important to you, they should be invited to the wedding. And if you haven't maintained a relationship, it would be even more odd to send a thank you for coaching you however many years ago.

ETA: Social media kinda fills the gap that announcements did years ago.

That sounds super awkward.

I think an announcement is a fine idea, but a thank you seems weird. Including a personalized note on the announcement could be okay though, I think

"Thanks for being special, but not THAT special"

Pass.

Idk if its gift grabby, if i got this in the mail i certainly wouldn't run out to buy you a gift...but I wouldn't be sure what to do honestly. I think you should skip this and skip the letters. Instead of a wedding announcement, maybe send out a Christmas card after the wedding with a picture from your day? That alone would get the point across. You can even add something like "Thank you for sharing in our love story, Happy Holidays from the new Mr. and Mrs (name)......."

I think the solution is to send them an announcement of your marriage not a thank you. Announcements are sent to people left off the invite list and have no gift obligation attached to them.

You don't need the occasion of your wedding to thank people. I think your intent is very sweet, just don't connect it to your wedding in any way, or it could come across the wrong way. You can send a nice note to these people anytime. Their birthday, the holidays, or a date that reminds you of them would be perfect.

I agree with @kelly it should be separate than the wedding (except the professor). Otherwise it could be gift grabby.

I think it would be quite odd to send a note detailing how all the things they ever taught you culminated in your wedding. Surely, your swim coach and youth leader were trying to teach you a few life lessons along the way, but their sole goal wasn't to help you become marriage material. They were coaching you to be a well rounded human being who could be successful in a myriad of situations. Or just a good swimmer and a good sport. Getting you married wasn't the end goal for them. Why thank them now? It makes it sounds like the only thing you wanted to learn from them was how to get married.

I think it can be a sweet gesture when you run into a former teacher or coach and you tell them they had an impact on your life. I'd wait until the next time you run into them (you said you periodically have contact) and simply mention "hey, you were right about ____, and I'm glad I learned that from you." No need to do it just because you're getting married and to make a huge, awkward production out of it.

The only exception might be that professor that introduced you two. I'd send him an invite with a simple note that says "thanks for introducing us!" If he attends, I'd probably allude to how you met and point him out with a thank you if you do any kind of thank you/welcome toast at the reception.