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K
Just Said Yes March 2020

Wedding after the marriage

K, on March 16, 2020 at 7:37 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 5
So I was supposed to get married 3/15/2020 to my fiance of 9 years, at what was a destination wedding for most of our guests but on 3/12 I found out a lot of my guests could not or didn't feel safe to travel in the midst of the pandemic so I made the decision to postpone my wedding. So of course I was bummed and so was my family but I started chatting with with my mom about a justice of the peace wedding since I had a valid marriage license. Apparently she thought I was kidding but never really said she disapproved. Anyway Sat the night before 3/15 it occurred to me I could get married by a notary so my fiance and I thought this is great we can have a small little wedding just the two of us on the day we planned... The next day. When I told my family they flipped out saying why would I do that without including them and if I do it my mom who was supposed to be my Matron of honor would not stand up for me at my fake wedding and my brother who was supposed to walk me down the aisle because my dad died a year ago said he'd not sure he can walk me down. Long story short we decided to get married anyway just the two of us and our dog on 3/15. It's exactly what we wanted. Of course my family is angry. So to help appease them a bit I'm wondering if anyone has an idea how to have a wedding ceremony since we are already married... Is there some way to say the ceremony differently so my family doesn't feel like it's fake wedding. I don't feel the same. I feel that the wedding is celebration but we'll ya

5 Comments

Latest activity by Theresa, on March 17, 2020 at 2:56 PM
  • N
    VIP September 2020
    Neeva ·
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    I think that people should be more understanding given the situation. I am so sorry your family did not support you but glad you got married with you two and your dog! How sweet!

    I think that you just be honest with people and say you are legally married and having a vow renewal and reception to follow.

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  • Stephanie
    Dedicated April 2021
    Stephanie ·
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    You can still have a normal wedding. And some officiants actually charge cheaper rates if you're already married because they don't have to sign and mail back the marriage license for you. The only difference between "real" and "fake" is the signing bit. And I'm pretty sure the family doesn't stand around to see it being done anyway!

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  • C
    Savvy June 2020
    Christina ·
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    That’s so ridiculous. It’s not about them, it’s about you! And given the circumstances, it’s not outrageous. My wedding is June 6 and I’m even thinking if things don’t die down by then, we should just go to the courthouse and still have a wedding another time if we have to. I hope it doesn’t come to that but things are getting crazy out there.


    I don’t see why it should matter to other people. It’s like taking a different route to the same destination. I am also sorry you have to put up with that. It is no less of a “real” wedding in my opinion.
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  • Dierdra
    Super August 2021
    Dierdra ·
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    I would still have the whole ceremony and reception. The only difference is you don't sign the documents afterwards! It should be no different or feel any different, this is the way you want to get married, surrounded by family and friends. I would just say that. Congratulations now and then!

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  • T
    Expert May 2010
    Theresa ·
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    I agree with PPs, having a vow renewal and reception at a later date would be totally appropriate.

    I'm glad you decided to go through with the wedding on your original date. An intimate wedding with your dog will be a wonderful memory. Congratulation to your both on your marriage!

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