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Ashley
Beginner September 2024

We don’t want a registry, can my fiancé and i just ask for money?

Ashley, on January 1, 2022 at 3:32 PM Posted in Registry 1 20
SOS!!!
My fiancé and I have lived together for 3 years and have everything we need. Quite honestly the only thing that we are in need of is money. Is it okay to just have a registry full of gift cards or just ask for money? Maybe call it like the “honeymoon fund” so it sounds better? We don’t want to come across desperate or selfish. We just don’t “need” anything.
Please let me know your full opinion!tenor.gif

20 Comments

Latest activity by Jacks, on January 29, 2022 at 2:37 AM
  • Jasmine S.
    Rockstar May 2022
    Jasmine S. ·
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    You don't have to make a registry. If people ask where you're registered just say you don't have one and they should understand that subtly means "give us cash." You could also make a registry with like, 10 or 20 items on it (maybe small things or stuff you already have but could use an upgrade) and have the rest be a honeymoon fund.
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  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
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    If you really don’t “need” anything then go for skipping the registry altogether (or select a few items). You mentioned not wanting to sound desperate but asking for money will appear exactly that way. Guests who desire to gift you with money will do so without you asking. But definitely avoid making your wedding feel like a charity event.
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  • S
    Savvy September 2021
    Sav ·
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    Yes. You can set up a honeymoon fund. Or a registry for other things such as dinners, wine tasting, home renovations, hotels, etc.
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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    Agree with this. Some people don’t give cash period, and take offense to any requests for cash, while other people only give cash and refuse to give physical gifts. This is entirely dependent on your families and social circles’ customs and traditions so ask those attending your wedding what is acceptable to them.


    Don’t say anything about wanting cash, but graciously accept whatever you get. Your wedding is not a charity or money-making event. Be aware that if you don’t register, you will get personalized items you don’t want and can’t return. To prevent that, is there anything you want that you wouldn’t spend your own money on?
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  • K
    Beginner May 2022
    Kelly ·
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    We have been together 12 years. We really don’t need anything but would like to do a honeymoon. We did honeyfund. You can tell your guest what you would like to use the money for. You can choose a package for a specific trip and experiences during that or just a general fund for the honeymoon. We did the second one… I felt it was more elegant way to approach that we don’t need anything.
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  • T
    Dedicated July 2022
    Tyff ·
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    I’ve seen cute inserts for invitations that say honeymoon fund- this is what me and my fiancé are doing.
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  • Christy
    Just Said Yes September 2022
    Christy ·
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    tenor.gif
    Thats what we are doing
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  • B
    Just Said Yes April 2024
    Breanna ·
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    I know Disney does it I’m not quite sure about other resorts but they make a honeymoon website so people can get you gift cards to spend on your honeymoon there.
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  • MrsMcK
    VIP September 2017
    MrsMcK ·
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    The proper way to do this is to not have a registry or a shower; this will tell people that money is your preferred gift. Asking for money outright is tacky. People will understand what you want by skipping the registry.
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  • Sine
    Devoted March 2022
    Sine ·
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    I did this same thing. We live together already and don't need anything so I just asked for money towards a honeymoon we are planning for 2023 (we delayed our honeymoon hoping covid would get better...).
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  • Kristen
    Expert October 2021
    Kristen ·
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    I wanted to just do a honeymoon registry, as my husband and I had also lived together a long time before getting married, but my in-laws convinced us that there would be too many guests who were more old-fashioned and would want to give us something physical. Anyway, as for sites where you can ask for money, Zola and Honeyfund offer such services.

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  • Kasey
    Dedicated June 2022
    Kasey ·
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    Everyone is going to have a different opinion on this but I am of the opinion that you shouldn't ask for money (although I have been to weddings where they do and it doesn't bother me, just not something I want to do). Simply do not have a registry and people will get the hint that you want money. Some people will insist on giving a physical gift regardless, so it might be beneficial to have a small registry and give out the registry info to only those people.

    Some websites that let you set up honeymoon funds thru them will take a percentage, so just be on the look out for that if you go that route!

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  • Orianna
    Devoted December 2022
    Orianna ·
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    We did some small registries at a few places to satisfy those who feel the need to give us stuff - and then we set up a Honeyfund! (Literally the website we used is called that) you can set it up for your honeymoon, or to go towards buying a house or whatever! They can contribute to certain things (we're doing a Honeymoon fund, so they can chip in towards airfare or hotels or dinners) or just give us however much they want for anything.

    We don't need much either, so for us this was the best compromised. A small amount of physical things and then a honeyfund! We linked it to our website and everything.

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  • C
    Beginner April 2022
    Caitlin ·
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    We don’t want a registry, can my fiancé and i just ask for money? 1

    I thought about having a “honeymoon shower” and something like this as the invitation to it. Or you could include this in your wedding invitation.

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  • C
    Beginner April 2022
    Caitlin ·
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    We don’t want a registry, can my fiancé and i just ask for money? 2
    You could also have something like this sitting on the gift table at the wedding.
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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    Registry/gift/money information has no place in the invitation. If you must send it, that is what word of mouth is for. Showers are for physical gifts.
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  • C
    Beginner April 2022
    Caitlin ·
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    I’ve never received a wedding invitation that didn’t have the couple’s registry on it. How else would the guests know what they wanted? If you’re reply to that is the shower invitation, there are lots of reasons someone wouldn’t be invited to a shower like living out of town, or simply being a man, because most bridal showers are just for women. Therefore I don’t think it would be rude to include it in the invitation but that’s just my opinion.
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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    Word of mouth. The parents and bridesmaids/groomsmen have successfully passed on the information for decades. There is someone on each side that the guests can get in touch with to find out where to go. Also, registries are public online, whether you are registered at Amazon, Walmart, Target, Zola, etc


    When in doubt if something is rude or not, consult the Miss Manners Guide to Weddings.
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  • Jacks
    Champion November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    This. Definitely don't put gift information on the invitation. That looks like a gift grab. Very against etiquette.

    Most people will gift money but a small registry for those that want to give a physical gift is a good idea.

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  • Jacks
    Champion November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    This is actually not considered polite. You never ask guests for money at the reception. Good hosting means guests shouldn't open their wallets at your party.

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