Skip to main content
ARE YOU A VENDOR?

Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Mrs.a.brown
Savvy August 2019

Walking down the aisle

Mrs.a.brown, on December 14, 2018 at 3:53 AM Posted in Wedding Ceremony 0 10
Saved
Reply
So this has been an issue since my sister got married...then my mom remarried a few years later. My dad and I aren't to close, yet we have a million things in common, so it feels like we are. I went to live with my mom after their divorce and he lives out of state. There has always been issues of bullying from him to me since I was a kid. He's changed a lot since then...and I mean A LOT! However, I still hold a grudge. My stepdad kind of became a proxy dad as I graduated and now feels more like a father then my own dad. I've thought a lot about which one to walk me down the aisle, but keep going back to square 1. My brother died a little over a year ago and it's been really hard on my dad (my bros went with my dad while my sis and I stayed with mom). I feel like any progress we've made on rebuilding our relationship will be shattered if I tell him I want my stepdad to walk me down the aisle. I've also considered having both or my mom/brother, but can't make up my mind. I feel guilty to not want my own dad, but also remember he's already walked my sister down the aisle. My stepdad doesn't have any kids so he will never get the chance if I say no to him. I don't want it to just be me and i already have my sis as my MoH. Thoughts?

10 Comments

Latest activity by Mrs.a.brown, on June 14, 2019 at 2:02 AM
  • Colleen
    Master September 2019
    Colleen ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    It is up to you. Maybe if you wanted your step dad can walk you down and you and your dad can do the farther daughter dance? This is only if you want.
    • Reply
  • Becca
    Devoted October 2019
    Becca ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I would present it very logically to your bio dad like you did here if you really want your step dad to do it. Just explain that step dad isn't going to get that experience and you really want him to have the opportunity to do that. Reassure bio dad that it doesn't mean you love one of them more. It just means that both have a special place.

    That being said, you could also consider having them both do it. Maybe split your aisle in half and one of them walks you down the first half while the other does the second half. It's unconventional, but so is your situation.
    • Reply
  • Chandra
    Master May 2019
    Chandra ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I've seen it done before where step dad walks her from the back to the center of the and bio dad takes her from there to the altar. It was very sweet.
    Would something like that be a possibility?
    • Reply
  • Jessica
    Expert March 2019
    Jessica ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I'd have both
    • Reply
  • Alexandra
    VIP June 2019
    Alexandra ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I recently went to a wedding where both the bio dad and step dad walked the bride down the aisle together (one on each side). And then for the father/daughter dance, she danced with her bio dad for the first half of the song and then her step dad for the half of the song. She loves both dearly and they get along well with each other, so it might be a little different from yours. But you can do whatever feels right for YOU!
    • Reply
  • Jazmin
    Super April 2019
    Jazmin ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    You are the only one who can make a choice, but you can also consider walking yourself to the altar, that way you don't have to chose anybody.

    • Reply
  • Alexandra
    Super December 2018
    Alexandra ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I came across this idea somewhere (I can't remember where): her dad walked the bride down the first half of the aisle and then was met by her step dad and then BOTH dad finished walking her down the aisle. Could you consider something like this or some variation?

    • Reply
  • Mrs.a.brown
    Savvy August 2019
    Mrs.a.brown ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Thank you everyone for your ideas. I've got s lot of thinking to do, but hopefully it won't be as stressful. I'll let you all know how things turn out. Still have 8 months, so I can breathe for now.
    • Reply
  • Mrs.a.brown
    Savvy August 2019
    Mrs.a.brown ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    So I think I came up with a good plan with everyone on board, for once. I'm going to have my step dad walk me to the beginning of the aisle, then my Dad would finish by walking me down the aisle. I'm just trying to figure out the logistics of it now.
    • Reply
  • Mrs.a.brown
    Savvy August 2019
    Mrs.a.brown ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    UPDATE:

    So last week my Step-Dad texted me and told me he doesn't want to walk me halfway down the aisle. After a long talk and some deep rooted feelings, I got him to tell me why. Turns out he has a lot of bent up issues regarding my Dad and doesn't want to hand me off to him for the 2nd half. So, he opted out completely. So I'll respect his wishes and not include him in the ceremony at all. My Dad is now walking me all the way. He didn't ask questions as to why the change. I'm guessing he's just happy to still be included.

    Thank you to everyone for your thoughts. You helped a lot; seriously!!

    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×
WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Explore how we embrace diversity

Groups

Show more

WeddingWire article topics