Skip to main content

Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Kristen
Expert February 2023

Vows in private or ceremony?

Kristen, on September 18, 2022 at 2:27 PM Posted in Wedding Ceremony 0 9
We are writing our vows and cannot decide whether to read them at our first look in private or at the ceremony. We don’t have issues with speaking in front of people, it’s just more about the moment. On one hand, it would be nice to have a special, private moment. On the other hand, our guests are there to celebrate our marriage and love for each other, so it would be nice to share with them that special moment. I really could go either way. I’m curious what others are choosing to do.

9 Comments

Latest activity by Annmarie, on November 1, 2022 at 4:44 PM
  • R
    Rockstar
    Rosebud Online ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Completely up to you, if you want you can do it privately and then again in front of everyone. Nobody has to know you had that special private moment. Best of luck to youSmiley heart

    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle Online ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    You have to confirm what the legal requirements are of your location. Where we are, during the ceremony itself there must be a declaration of intent that you are entering the union of your own free will and then vows said, whether repeating the officiant or something personally written. Everything else is optional. From talking to brides we know in other states, the same applies there too. During your first look, you can share anything you want.
    • Reply
  • Bailey
    Expert October 2023
    Bailey ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    We haven't decided either! We are writing our own and both tend to be emotional + good with words, so I imagine our vows will be super, super emotional. While I kind of want to be in private for that, I feel like because we are so close with all of our guests that they would cherish hearing + seeing us in these moments. Have you ever seen video/pictures of MOG, MOB, friends, etc crying while listening to the bride + groom exchange vows? So beautiful, and I know I would love looking back on that too. A lot of your guests are likely very invested in your love!

    • Reply
  • Kristen
    Expert February 2023
    Kristen ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment

    Great point! I think we are leaning toward saying them during the ceremony. Thank you Smiley smile

    • Reply
  • Paige
    VIP October 2022
    Paige ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    We're getting married in a Catholic church, so personal vows were out from the start. We are writing each other letters that we'll read before the ceremony and have our videographer capture it and include it in the video. We aren't doing a first look, but I did want to give us each some "personal" time before the wedding to take everything in before the ceremony. I also love when couples' personal vows or letters are included in their wedding videos Smiley smile

    • Reply
  • Bird
    Super June 2021
    Bird ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    We decided to say some traditional/generic vows at our ceremony. We repeated it after the officiant.



    We did consider writing our own vows but thought it was a bit too personal and we might be shy to divulge more intimate details. Instead we wrote letters to each-other to read the morning of the wedding since we were in separate locations. Smiley smile Smiley smile Smiley smile
    • Reply
  • I
    Just Said Yes May 2024
    Isabelle ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Traditionally, guests at your wedding ceremony serve as witnesses of the vows you’re making each other. That said, tradition is pretty much out these days with weddings and you should definitely do whatever you want! To me, the significance of making vows in front of witnesses matters. Maybe you could read your personal written vows to each other in private and then do the classic “in sickness and in health till death do us part” or something in front of the guests if you care about it.
    • Reply
  • Holly
    Savvy September 2024
    Holly ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    We plan on doing private vows at our first look then the traditional vows at the actual ceremony in front of everyone. My fiancé is great on front of people but I’m only good in front of people I don’t know. I’m just going to be too nervous to pour my heart out to him in front of everyone. I do not want to be standing up there in front of everyone stumbling over my words because I’m nervous to speak in front of everyone.
    • Reply
  • Annmarie
    Savvy October 2023
    Annmarie ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    We decied to do the "traditional" vows in front of everyone, but exchange personal vows privately. The personal vows will probably be after the ceremony, when every one else is at cocktail hour, and its just me and my FH.

    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×

Related articles

WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Learn more

Groups

WeddingWire article topics