Vows! Hellpppppp

I think they are a bit long.. but I'm more of a 20 minute ceremony type person lol. I think one or two "goofy" comments are good, but after that it starts to take away from the sentiment in my opinion.

You guys sound like an awesome match

I love them!
Of course FH and I are pretty goofy as well 😂

With a quick read, I thought your vows were funny but sincere at the same time. I think your guests would love and enjoy hearing your sense of humor in it, because I totally did 😃

I love the personal touches. They're so cute.

I agree with @Anne though. These are super long. I'd keep the first two paragraphs, pick three "I vow" paragraphs (with the last one saying "And finally, I vow..."), and keep the final paragraph.

I love this because it’s loving yet funny—sounds like you both have a lot of fun together! The only thing is... it’s way too loooong. I’d keep only 3 of your fav vows then read this whole thing out loud to see how it sounds.

Mackenzie, thank you sharing these! I loved them!! So cute, they were both goofy and serious all in one and I love the personal touches to it! I'm sure your guests and your FH will love them

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I agree. Honestly, they are too long and like pps mentioned should probably be shortened down to 3-4 vows. I think a bit of personality or goofiness is good but, when you do it too much it takes away from their meaning and makes them less special. I'd stick to 1 or 2 goofy things at the most.

They are cute, but seem too long for me. You mentioned driving in the car and singing twice and raising kids twice. I would probably edit the vows down a bit. The last paragraph gave me goosebumps!

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See I think they are a bit long too, but I am having trouble cutting them down. Also our ceremony is basically just vows, we aren't having any extra readings or anything!

These are too long, but I don’t think they’re too goofy.

I agree with most of these ladies. Long winded! You can trim it down a bit without losing the sentiment.

I also agree with others above, they are really long. Sweet, but long. Try reading them out loud and imagine having to pause for emotions and laughter. By the time you get to the end, what you said in the beginning may be kind of lost both by your FH and your guests.

I would pair it down to something you can read in under a minute, certainly with a joke or two but definitely focusing on the heart of what you want to say (that last paragraph is wonderful). Then - write those other vows in a love letter to give your FH before/after the ceremony in private - and that can be as silly and full of jokes as want!

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I really like the idea of the letter! I was planning on writing him several but had never thought of including the vows I needed to cut!

I was having the hardest time figuring out which ones I didn't want to say!

Let me precede this by saying these are YOUR vows, and if you like them how they are, no one elses opinion matters! So please be sure to take my (and everyone elses) opinions just as suggestions, and dont pressure yourself to take the suggestions if you like them the way they are. That being said, heres my opinion:

I really like them, i think they are sweet and genuine and and i love the personal goofy touches... though, at least in my opinion, i think there may be a few too many. To me it seems a bit like, with every nice thing you say, theres always a “catch” even if its a joke. I DO like the goofy touches, but i would take SOME of them out if i were you.

Like i said though thats just my immediate reaction reading them as someone who doesnt know you or FH... feel free to disregard!

It is too small for me to read but it looks like it's going to take a long time to get through the vows. The vows should be like a quarter to half of that length

Here is the edited version!!

Here is the edited version

View Quoted Comment This is beautiful! LOVE the new version! Don’t change a thing!

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Thank you! It was hard for me to cut a lot of that out, but I am going to include the ones I cut out in my letter to him!

I write for a living, so sometimes I can get a little wordy!

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Love it. The edited version is perfect!!