Virtual Bridal Showers thoughts?

I've never really heard of this, but honestly it sounds a bit gift-grabby. I sympathize for your situation, but not because you won't get shower gifts, because you won't get the experience of a shower Perhaps someone who is more familiar with this concept can give a better answer.

Where is your wedding? Are you going to go back to California a little bit before? Maybe you could have one closer to your actual wedding.

That is a really tough situation to be in. Props to your man for serving our country and props to you for being so supportive of him!

Oh I feel for your situation but honestly if I were invited to an online shower I may feel it a tad gift grabby. Are you back home for holidays or anything if it could be held then? Every girl I've known to be married has had a shower, so I understand still wanting to try to make it work. Not for the gifts but just where I'm from it is just part of the wedding culture - an experience with the ladies closest to you. If it doesn't work naturally, I wouldn't force it. It might not be meant to be.

I also would see it as gift grabby. No one is entitled to a shower and if you can't even attend one should not be given.

I'm in Virginia too! Right by a military base..not sure which one. Ft belvoir I believe

The virtual shower wouldn't have the same effect for me. I could sit there in my PJs, you know?

I'd express concern to your BM and let her know that you're willing to forgo the shower based upon your circumstances (if that is what you want, of course!)

I'm sorry you are so far away from all of your friends/family. Unfortunately, to me, a virtual shower sounds super gift grabby and if I were "invited" to one, I'd decline, unless it was a super close friend and then I would give some serious side-eye.

I actually did this. We didn't do gifts. I really enjoyed it. They showered me with advice and recipes. We also had mad libs and questions. They had 3 days to 'attend'.

I'm so sorry for your situation, I hope it all works out for you. But I do agree with others, a virtual shower does seem a bit gift grabby. Hopefully you find something that works for you.

My college friend married a man in the military (I can't remember which branch) and had a similar problem.

Instead of doing a shower, her friends and family sent out "invites" but were really only requesting a recipe to be emailed. They collected recipes from all of her friends and family and put it into a beautiful recipe book. At the bottom of each recipe is a little note from the sender (so sweet!!)

Many of her family recognized that she couldn't have a shower and sent her gifts anyway, but that wasn't really the point. Her family didn't want her to entirely miss out of the experience and it was such a meaningful gift.

I don't see it as gift grabby, but ad your friend/family I would want to do something special for u. Online games could be fun still. Maybe do what DJ F said and have the host stress a gift of a recipe or advice instead.

I'd skip the shower completely if you're unable to attend it.

I think if it's along the lines of what DJF and Jersey Jen suggested, then it would be ok, but anything else looks a little gift grabby, even if that isn't the intent.

Are you going back to California for your wedding? If so, you could always make a long weekend of going to check out vendors, dresses, etc. and having your shower. If not, I agree with PP and have a non-gift shower.

I think I would see it as gift-grabby if I were invited. Sorry!

I probably would decline the invite. If the bride were a close friend, I would probably gift them something privately after their engagement anyway.

Curious - how exactly does this work? Does everyone meet up in person and they Skype you in? Does everyone just chat on a virtual shower webpage and have gifts mailed to you?

To be blunt - this is so odd to me. I just wouldnt have a shower in this case.

Thank you everyone for your views/opinions, seeming gift grabby was my main concern so that just confirmed it. I know my maid of honor was just trying to find another way for me to have the experience but I will probably just skip the bridal shower and possibly do what Jersey Jen and DJ said about the recipes. It's a very sweet idea.

For those of you who were curious as to what a "Virtual Bridal shower" is here is what my maid of honor sent me as an idea.

http://cleverbetty.blogspot.com/2011/03/march-tutorial-how-to-host-virtual.html

Thank you all again, I really appreciate your help.

View Quoted Comment I’m interested to learn more about this. We want to have a bridal shower for my daughter but there is no location that’s good for a majority so a virtual shower is a great idea, with recipes and advice rather than gifts to mark the special event. How did yours work? What app(s) were used?

If you leave out the gifts, there is no reason not to do it. You'll be showered with advice and love, which is also what happens at a bridal shower.