Dj Tanner
June 2021

Venue planners driving me nuts

Dj Tanner, on March 16, 2021 at 2:36 PM Posted in Planning 0 20
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I’m so sick of having to repeat myself over and over to them and have them still get it wrong. I’m so sick of them telling me what they want or think will look better(it’s not that they think it will look any better, it’s just that it’s thousands more). I’m so sick of feeling like I am strictly just their profit tree. I know that’s the reality of it, but there are many other vendors that have a lot more passion about what they do. I’m sick of requesting things that they give me prices for and then they don’t want to do it after I select it. Just ranting.

20 Comments

Latest activity by Melody, on March 17, 2021 at 1:10 PM
  • Sharonda
    Rockstar January 2021
    Sharonda ·
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    That sounds so frustrating! I'm so sorry to hear about your experience. My venue planner was the best - I don't know what I would have done with her. Can you sit them down, let them know how disappointed you are with their services and restate your expectations? I think they need to understand that as the client what you want is the most important thing (regardless of their thoughts or suggestions otherwise).

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  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
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    Thanks for listening! Yeah so I have discussed this with them multiple times, and they are just so difficult. It’s amazing how everyone is so great in the beginning when you initially signed the contract and then once you sign the contract it’s like dealing with nonsense.
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  • Courtney
    Expert September 2022
    Courtney ·
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    What are they trying to pressure you into? Also, super rude of them. There whole job is to listen to what you, as the client, wants.

    If it were something simple such as room layout, I would say they're trying to push you to a better flow because they know how the room works and how people move through it. But pushing you repeatedly to upgrade a service (chairs maybe?) is ridiculous. After the first no, sure they can suggest it again, but 2 is the max amount of times it should be suggested.

    I'm sorry you're having to go through this.

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  • Kristin
    Devoted December 2021
    Kristin ·
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    I completely get it! Our catering company sold themselves as a “one stop shop” complete with decor, flowers, and a complimentary wedding planner(!). 3 months after signing the contract I hadn’t had any contact with them until I forced them to schedule a tasting. The wedding planner didn’t even bother to look at what my fiancé’s name was, prepare for my parents to be there (we paid for 2 extra people ahead of time), or have anything positive to say about my ideas. Then 3 days later I got an email telling me I owed $$$ towards the payment plan... which was never mentioned or in my contract.


    I agree that it seems some vendors are just out to make money and do what they can to get you to sign. I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time with your venue!!
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  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
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    Wow! That sucks! I’m sorry you’re going through that! Yeah, my DJ is amazing! I mean he’s expensive too but at least he has passion for what he does! My fiancé and I don’t necessarily care about how much things cost.... I mean we obviously do, we have definitely done things to cut corners and save money like doing 50 flowers etc. but our wedding is still going to be about 40 lK anyhow. we’re not idiots we know that it’s a wedding and weddings are expensive, but when people are out right just trying to squeeze you out of every dime possible without putting any regards towards what do you want your wedding to be it’s just out right insulting to me.
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  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
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    So for example, we were told that a FULL tent layout for our chandeliers that we wanted started at 2800. Keep in mind this is their pricing that they gave to me when I initially looked at their prices LOL. They’ve come back at me multiple times with almost $6000 for a crystal chandelier set up which is not what I even want, because we’re going to have a greenery wrapped around the chandeliers. I corrected them and they came back with me with another $5000 price, I corrected them again and then they said oh OK yeah we will give you that but it’s only seven chandeliers instead of 10. I said but your pricing says it’s a full tent layout, they said yeah it is but it’s more towards the center LOL. So I said to them OK well seeing as how you charge 275 for the smallest chandeliers, will just take 10 of those instead which would be less money than the seven that they were offering! I really just think she didn’t like the fact that I was going to get 10 chandeliers for the price that they charge/said they charge on the PDF. She then said that she thinks the small chandeliers will “offset”the look and not be ‘cohesive’. I then pushed back and said to her no I don’t think it will offset the room at all. I actually think it will look great. She then comes back at me and says well I have to see if the decor company will approve it.
    “ you have to see if the decor company will approve it“ ?!?! The only one that needs to approve it is me! It’s not a matter of “if they can do it “because these are the products that they are offering, it’s only a matter of if they think it will look good a.k.a. want me to spend more than they actually initially said it cost.



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  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
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    Venue planners driving me nuts 1
    Like as another example even these two wooden things that I’m going to have LOL. This is their pricing that they gave to me. $75 each. They put $85 each on my proposal sheet. It’s like even down to $10 difference is they were trying to do this with. When I called them out on it they were like oh OK no problem will correct it. They never even said it was a mistake LOL. They’ve done this the entire time. It’s just getting so frustrating
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  • Courtney
    Expert September 2022
    Courtney ·
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    Oof. Yea that's a big flag for me. I would just make sure to keep notes of your interactions and make sure to leave them an honest review at the end of the day. Get everything you can in writing, because knowing venues they will sometimes try to sneak something in or say that the price isn't possible or was just a rough estimate and once you gave more detail they were able to get a better idea coming up with a more true cost.

    I think you're absolutely right to come up with your solution of ten small chandeliers, and I can't imagine it would look bad in anyway. So, screw them.

    Their review are the honest reflection of who they are, so make sure to leave one on every platform of them when you're finished.

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  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
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    Dudeee rightttt!! I mean come on, they are chandeliers! The single chandelier is the size we will be getting. It’s going to be an additional $65 per greenery for chandelier, which we already agreed to that was fine. How on earth would this not look “cohesive “?! And the funniest part about it is that the one that they were offering me with only seven chandeliers only came with three larger chandeliers, and the rest were the small chandeliers. Like it really just makes me cry because this place is way more than just a venue for my fiancé and I. Him and I have spent so much time on the grounds here with our dogs and we would go by the water in the summer etc. and it’s just a really meaningful place. We didn’t bother looking at any other venues because we knew that this was the place we wanted to get married at. It just sucks to know have this bad experience from them. And you are absolutely right I am going to write a really strong review once my day is said and done.Venue planners driving me nuts 2

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  • Courtney
    Expert September 2022
    Courtney ·
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    Man I totally get that disappointment. FH and I are getting married at a venue I used to work for, and is also where we met. They haven't communicated as well as I would like and are doing a bunch of upcharges that I wasn't really expecting.

    It's so frustrating when they refuse to work with you. When they quoted $65 per chandelier was that for the big ones/little ones or all of them? Because maybe you should come back with a request on cheaper greenery since you're only using the small ones lol.

    I also wonder if you're catching stuff in older/dated material that they hadn't pulled off the website yet and they're mad because they're having to honor old prices.

    Overall I think your wedding is going to be gorgeous, so don't let them get to you too much.

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  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
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    That sucks to hear about your venue. Especially seeing as how you brought them your business because he used to work for them. These places really have no souls. So the smallest chandeliers are 275 a piece. So 10 of those would be 2750. The additional greenery is $65 per chandelier to add. LOL you’re right I should come back at them with that, but it’s not even worth the fight at this point about smaller chandeliers and less greenery LOL. As far as the pricing goes, we were locked in for 2020 pricing and they said your pricing once you sign a contract will not change and you were locked in. They really have zero excuse. But thanks for listening to me rant. It really helps. ♥️
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  • Melody
    Expert April 2021
    Melody ·
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    Oh, man, that must be so frustrating! I'm sorry to hear about all of this! Our venue (which is pretty all-inclusive except for cake and photographer) has been wonderful with us. To be fair, my FH is a plumber who regularly does work on their property and, well, you definitely don't want to piss off your plumber. But they're also just really good people. I did deal with a bit of that when I went dress shopping the other day though. I hate dresses normally and just can't stomach the notion of paying oodles of money for a dress that I'll only wear once. The people at the shop knew my budget and that the small budget I have included any alterations. (Personally, I'd prefer to not bother with them and I think I've actually found a dress that's perfect and that I won't need to alter.) But, of course, they routinely show me dresses that are "only just a little bit" above my budget and would definitely need a good amount of alterations. I mean, I get that part of your job is trying to upsell, but I made my budget exceedingly clear. Just stop...

    I'm glad you feel like this is a community where you can air out those feelings, though! Sometimes just being able to rant it out can be so helpful.

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  • Samantha
    Rockstar October 2022
    Samantha ·
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    I am in procurement for state govt and this stuff annoys me so bad. Just today I had to send an email “per contract xxxxxx section 10 paragraph C, the price structure is blah blah blah” and he relied “I haven’t read the contract.” DUDE I could not care less if you read it, you signed it.
    I bet they pegged you as a couple that will go all out and are trying to squeeze as much as possible from you.
    But..so you don’t have an adversarial relationship with them and have your wedding suffer, I would suggest having a face to face again. Print two copies of everything - three if your fh will be there. Start out with “I feel like we got off on the wrong foot. This venue is gorgeous, and I am really looking forward to having my wedding here. Can we go over the proposal again so I can see where my confusion is coming from?”This will allow her to save face a bit so she isn’t defensive, and also make it clear you have your ducks in a row and expect them to stand by their word.
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  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
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    Yes! absolutely does help to rant it out! That sucks that you went through that with your dress appointment. Dress appointments are stressful as it is, let alone having people trying to get you into a dress just for the price of it. No souls or passion about their professions
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  • Kristin
    Devoted December 2021
    Kristin ·
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    Exactly! If a couple is going to pay a bunch of money it better be exactly what they want, not what someone else thinks is nice. And I’m glad you got a great DJ! Even if anything else goes awry he can keep the party going in the direction you want. I wish you all the best of luck of getting through to your venue planners ❤️
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  • Julie
    VIP February 2020
    Julie ·
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    Where's my invite, DJ?! This looks GORGEOUS.

    I'll eat beforehand, and I'm great at small-talk if you want to sit me next to a "difficult" family member! 😁

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  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
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    Lol thanks! Wish I could kick out my event planners and have you there instead LOL
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  • Julie
    VIP February 2020
    Julie ·
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    I LOVE wedding planning, too, lol
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  • Liza
    Savvy September 2022
    Liza ·
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    I am so sorry to hear you are dealing with this! I can't imagine how frustrating that is for you. I would end up being an absolute bridezilla for sure with this one. I'm not good when people go against what they tell me. I've kept copious notes and have printed off every PDF and have every email communication saved. I don't want to get trapped with anything I didn't approve or want. It sounds like you've done a great job keeping track of what they've originally told you so at least you are pushing back. I'm not sure what the best communication is to get it to stop happening but if there's ever a vendor you can threaten not working with anymore that would do the trick for sure. It's hard when you've paid deposits or signed contracts but if you're able to challenge them in a way that would make them feel like your business with them is being threatened then they'll cooperate.

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  • Melody
    Expert April 2021
    Melody ·
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    TRUTH! Luckily the person I was working with directly wasn't too bad about it. It was mainly the assistants, who were definitely new. I can't really fault them too much with being new and all - I totally get wanting to make a good impression with the company so you can, you know, keep your job and all. But it does get a bit annoying.

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