Upset about my Bridal Shower

I say anything about it. I am not at all. I never asked her to give me a party. I never even said anyhting about it at all. I was just thinking she wasn't going to since she'd not mentioned anything about it.

I don't know. I really don't want alot but I do want everyone to be able to come and I just don't think alot of the ladies on the list would come to something like that..

Hell no your not selfish and your also thinking about your guests not wanting to do that.

Can you say hey I have some other ideas such as more intimate at so and so's house or I'd like it at such and such place?

My maid of honor wasn't planning it, cause she's not a planner, so I wrote out ideas like if have an afternoon shower i'd like heavy orderves or if we had a lunch i'd like italian food. I got a little to plan happy and gave her suggestions about color schemes but she's now planning it.

Except I didn't mention I didn't want it the day after my bachlorette party so now I either have to have a hangover for my shower or not drink that much at the bachlorette party.

A bar at 7pm screams beginning of a bachelorette party. Bridal showers should be a brunch or afternoon get together with family members that will not be invited to the bach. party. Is your MOH a regular party girl? Maybe she just doesn't understand the difference between the shower and the party?

Yeah, I think it's just cause she does not fully understand the difference between the two parties.

She is a bit of a party girl lol.

I am going to carefully drop hints. I feel bad that I agreed to everything she said already though. I have just been thinking for months she would not be planning one since she had not mentioned it then she suddenly tells me the other day she wants to plan one and to send her a guest list.

I've been to combo showers/b-parties that start around 7pm with dinner in a restaurant, gifts are opened in a party room or something, gifts go home with a trusted family member in their car, and then the younger/interested girls go out partying immediately after.

So I don't think it's necessarily inappropriate, I would just want to ask her more about her plans and tell the guests what to expect if they're confused.

It's maybe not traditional, but at the end of the day, she's throwing you a party, I'd let her do it. If it's something you don't want though, I think you're 100% entitled to speak up and say no. If it's not working out, you can decline the shower, worst case scenario.

Several of my friends haven't had showers/b-parties. It's okay if it doesn't happen.

One thing you can say is that you were talking to "random woman figure in your life" who didn't agree because some relatives may not be able to make it to a late party. That way it doesn't make you look like you are going back on your word...and she may realize that it's not all young people but also elderly relatives.

Thanx for the thoughts everyone....

I just want everyone there, like my Grandmas and my FMIL, and I know those people would not feel comfortable in a smoky bar...

I emailed her and asked her if we could do something around 3 pm insetad of 7 so that the older ladies will be able to make it. I said nothing about the location. Maybe she will change that herself.

Plus no matter what I intend to have a Bach party even if it's just me & a couple friends going out. Fh will be out the weekend before the wedding for his party, and theres no way I will be sitting home alone that weekend.

Also another thing is, she wants to just call everyone and invite them, not send invites in the mail. But I have cards for my registries. I don't know how anyone will get them???

If they dont come they don't come, you can always ask someone else to throw you a shower, and invite the kind of people that wouldnt go to that kind of shower? You should be happy she is throwing anything cause you could get nothing. Or give her a list of the peopel you think would go to that kind of thing, then ask one of your lrelatives to throw a standard boring mid afternoon tea and cookies and give me presents type shower?

I think suggesting it at 3pm is a good idea. As for your registries, you might just have to spread that through word of mouth.

I am actually jealous of your shower. want to switch? mine is this going to be a sunday brunch and very traditional and i asked to have a happy hour shower. looks like our bridal parties got our showers mixed up. my advice is to try to enjoy it since not every bride gets to have the shower of their preference