Upset about moh being a bridesmaid the month before im someone else's wedding

Yes, just get over it. It’s not a big deal

View Quoted Comment Thank you, its good to have an outsiders perspective!

Yep, definitely just get over it.

Yes definitely don’t stress about this.

In 2016 I was in 5 weddings from March-September and was MOH in 3 of them. I was able to be there for all my friends equally and get everything done that they needed me to.

One of my bridesmaids is standing in another friends wedding 8 days before mine. All you can do is love them through it. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Even though we’ve been engaged much longer than this other bride (October 2017 vs September 2018) her wedding is first so 🤷🏻‍♀️

My bridesmaid will also be 6 months pregnant at the time of our wedding.


I asked the other bride when all her showers/parties/etc was so that we could plan ours around hers so my bridesmaid wouldn’t be as stressed about making both events. And my bridesmaid has been INCREDIBLE! ❤️ Very blessed to have her in our life.

I don’t understand how this is at all upsetting.

I'm a little confused. You said you feel as though you arent allowed to talk about your wedding....but have you tried to and get shushed or something? I dont think extravagance really makes any difference and regardless, the other wedding is a good amount of time before yours. Theres plenty of time to have last minute help from your MOH.
I wouldnt give it another thought if I were you.

It's okay, weddings bring out emotions about weird things.

I've been engaged for a little over a year and will be getting married next fall. One of my bridesmaids recently got engaged and will actually be getting married 4 months before me! (I'll be in her wedding as well.)

She's had to listen to me talk about wedding planning for quite a while (though I don't think I've gone overboard), so I'm excited to hear about her plans now!

I get what you mean about the relationship troubles, though. When I first got engaged, she wasn't dating anyone, so I made a conscious effort not to talk about wedding stuff too much. She definitely seemed more interested once I talked with her about being a bridesmaid, and now that she's engaged herself, we trade wedding tips all of the time.

Even though my situation isn't exactly the same, all of this is to say that the friend/coworker's wedding and your friend being in it won't take the spotlight away from you and your wedding on your special day.

I would let this go and not stress over this. Im not sure how this is upsetting. The wedding is a 20 days before yours, she will definitely be at your wedding. It sounds like you are more having problems and jealousy of your moh being more involved in her friends wedding.
Why not talk to her about your wedding?
Im sorry, i just dont see the issue here

It's not a big deal, in my opinion. People have lives outside your wedding. Don't stress over this

No big deal. I have been in as many as 5-7 weddings April to November, makes up for the years when there are none. I did showers with meals, or heavy apps and desserts, for all, with 1or 2 co-hostess. 5 weddings before ours the 6th in October, that was ours. The only things I did not do, was 2 brides wanted spa days and get togethers of the 5 women in one, 4 women and 4 men in the other, because no one knew anyone else. I got together with the bride's involved, just doing usual dinners or movies, camping, clothes shopping unrelated to the wedding, multiple times in the year before the wedding. And had time to do gown alterations, free, for 3 wedding parties, plus the showers. But I did not have any interest in meeting brides friends from other times in her life. I know the brides in both cases were disappointed at my lack of interest in spa days and sleepovers pajama party style, of whole BP. But it was not being in so many weddings. I would have refused if only in one wedding in 2years. In both weddings, 2 of us worked evening shifts and weekends, and the brides wanted us to take 4-5days off work, during the engagement period, to socialize with WP. 2of us in full time grad school, the other 2 had babies a few months before the wedding, and kids at home . None of the four of us could afford using 5 extra days off in a year, on weekends. We needed them for having babies, or school exams. And me, to plan our wedding in a 5 month engagement.
It likely will not be tough to be in 2 weddings, provided neither one of f the bride's do not add to expectations. When asked, both brides who had expectations the WP would have social evening and overnight parties, never said a word when they asked us. Then 5-6 months down the line, did group chats and messages and announced, you will be so happy, I have planned... For a day the next month the. Always during work for 2 in each wedding. But we were not the only ones who did not go. And no one in one of these weddings would do what the bride wanted, 4 days bach party in Vegas. We planned 1 evening out. I was in multiple weddings. But people in just 1 did not want to take time off work for an unwanted vacation. Or spa evenings, or pj parties. Or spend 1200 dollars plus meals and expenses on someone else's bach party. In addition to dresses, showers, and 2gifts.
So I guess I am saying, her being in 2weddings close together will only be a problem if you go beyond the usual 5-6 hours for a shower, dress shopping, evening out back party, evening RD, and 6-8 hours wedding day. And think they should spend hundreds and hundred of dollars extra to treat you, and lots of days off work. None of those things are traditional. But are a recent fad that some now feel entitled to. 2 weddings in a couple months what with showers and wedding day, no problem. Still going out as friends, no problem. But if either bride wants to have BM or MOH spend huge amounts of money, and take lots of time off work, that is a problem . Usual, reasonable expectations, no problem.

I think it sounds like she seems more involved in her other friends wedding than yours, so maybe it's causing you to feel some kind of way. I'd just drop it too as other PPs said.

It's ok for your best friend to have other friends and be a part of their big day too. It's also ok for you to be excited about your wedding and share that excitement with your MOH, even of the other wedding is before yours

Without meaning to sound harsh, yes I think you need to get over it. Your friend knows her abilities and limits and if she thinks she can handle both weddings I would trust her to. If you want to talk about your wedding around her do it, if not then don't hold that against the other bride for being excited to talk about it.

It’s not a big deal. It’s not going to affect your day in any way.

It’s 20 days away from your wedding. I doubt she’s planning on spending 19 days there for that wedding and then leaving yours up to whatever, especially if she’s MOH. If she’s a good, responsible friend, give her some credit that she knows what she’s doing and worry about your wedding instead. Either way, this isn’t anything you can control.

I was in my bestfriend's wedding on a Saturday and maid of honor in my brother's wedding on a Sunday on the SAME WEEKEND. It was very hard on my liver and my pocketbook, but everything was just fine. Don't worry at all!!

As a bride myself, we set our wedding date to be 3 weeks after my cousin's wedding and I've felt really bad about it this entire time (I dont want anyone to think I am stealing their thunder). Weddings are emotional and quit political. I can relate on some of the stress you've felt. I've been engaged longer than my cousin has even known his bride, so I just had to bite the bullet and go for it. Everything will be fine if we are all married at the end of the day.

I personally feel like you shouldn't stress out as long as things are still going smooth in regards to your wedding events. She can do both and still give you her undivided attention.