Uninviting coworker..?

Honestly if you don't have to see this person again and you haven't sent any invites I wouldn't worry about it. If she isn't someone that matters once you walk out that door leave it at that.

It's okay, I screwed up too. I sort of invited two coworkers, and I truthfully cannot stand them most of the time. However, the two ladies sit right next to me and one of them is my partner. I felt obligated.

Unfortunately, you gotta bite the bullet and invite them still.

That's really rude

Send the invite! If you are leaving the job there is a good chance she wont even want to go anymore and will rsvp no. If you gave a STD or Verbal STD you need to invite otherwise its hella rude!

If you don't care that it's bad etiquette why did you ask? Just say whatever you want since it doesn't matter to you.

Send it! She might decline, you never know!

ETA: I did the same but I will send them invites.

Yeah you definitely should still invite her. I know it sucks, but verbally telling someone to save your date still counts. What if she did, in fact, save the date and then you turn around and "uninvite" her? That probably wouldn't make you feel great if it happened to you. Give her the invite and consider it a lesson learned.

Everyone will say it's rude to not send an invite but to be honest if it were me I'd "sweep it under the rug". I feel like some people get all hyped up when you start talking about a wedding and just insinuate they want to come and that's where that pressure came from.

Pretend it didn't happen, if you happen to run into her on one of your random work days - and she asks just say something about the budget and how you had to cut it down. But she probably wont say anything.

I'll get torn apart for this - but w/e

You have to invite her. but honestly if i got that invite and we didnt keep in touch i would probably just decline and send a gift.

UO but I wouldn’t invite her. If you’re not working there anymore, won’t see her ever again, aren’t close, don’t care, etc., I really don’t think it matters if you don’t invite her. If you think you’ll be working closely with her in the future or if you work in a small industry where you potentially may need her in the future for a job, I would but otherwise, no. The fact that you were pressured into it solidifies the fact. One of my girlfriends moved in with a male roommate (non-romantically) around the time I got engaged. I assumed we would be seeing him often so I told her she could probably bring him as a plus one. One night, shortly after we met while he was drinking, he essentially forced me to send him a save the date (taking my phone while I was using it, standing over me, demanding, etc). We had done them online through email to get the word out quickly. I soon found out he was a terrible person who was quite literally only nice to girls he could sleep with (so not me), he kept threatening to bring his friends or a tinder date with him and it was fine if they didn’t have a seat. H and I moved after the wedding so I knew I would never see him again. I had no issues not sending him an invite when they went out and my friend/his roommate came solo and everything was just fine.

Yeah it's really poor manners to uninvite someone.

Your options are:

Ignore/uninvite said co-worker and come off as rude to this person/people

Practice good manners and actually invite them.

There's no polite way to be impolite

Nah don't incite

As long as you don't care that the bridge is burned, by all means don't invite them. But if you are staying in the same field, there's a possibility that you could run into them again along the line. You don't want the last thing they remember of you is that you were rude.

Personally I would invite them. It could be a last hoorah as co-workers/ kind of friends. Who knows- maybe you'll end up talking shit about the company all night and become hella close lol.

I'm totally addicted to the Ask A Manager blog, and there was a really interesting situation a while ago where a letter writer had, years earlier, ran off in the middle of the night and left the country, leaving his live-in girlfriend behind with no warning at all. She didn't even know he was going until he was gone. Years later, in a whole different country, she became his supervisor. It did NOT end well for him.

This person apparently works in your industry. It's always good to be polite to colleagues and potential colleagues. You have no way of knowing what role they'll play in your future.

@Del Did you see the follow-up?

He ended up quitting because he couldn't tolerate being around her (HR gave them very reasonable rules), he ended up having to leave the country because he didn't have a valid visa or work authorization to work for another employer, and had to break up with the girlfriend he had in that country because she couldn't get a visa in the US.

Karma!

A verbal invite is an invite. You'll need to invite this person formally. It's either that, or your reputation in your industry will be at risk. It's really bad form to take back an invitation. There is no good way to do this.

Probably she does not like you that much either and will decline. I mean I would never go to a former colleagues wedding that I am not close to and spend my time and money on.... I would still send out an invite to avoid future problems and to look bad in front of the other colleagues.

And because it would be rude.

@MrsBdeG

I know, right? It was so simple what they were asking (rule of three, don't gossip about management, don't socialize WITH HER) and he just couldn't/wouldn't. It was ridiculous!