Uninviting an unwanted family member from wedding.

Completely understand he’s not welcome. Obviously no invitation will be sent to him and it’s the person that invited him without permission to explain that that was not appropriate and he’s not invited.

That would be a phone call and a ' hell no! From me. No need to be polite to a pedophile.

The mother had no right to extend a verbal invitation to anyone. Simply do not send a formal invitation and tell the mom to rescind her offer as it was not hers to give.

Tell the mother she must make this right and he is not.invited...no if ands or buts

View Quoted Comment Thank you Emma. I agree.

View Quoted Comment Thank you.

Her mom overstepped here, in my opinion. This is a terrible thing to do, especially if she was aware of the abuse. Since it was a verbal invite and no actual invitation and RSVP card was sent, I would make her mother call the person and rescind the invite that she extended. She needs to let these people know that they were not invited nor wanted there by the bride and groom (for obvious reasons). Personally I would want someone trustworthy to be with the mom when she uninvites these people, just to make sure she actually does it. I can’t imagine my mom doing such a horrible thing to me before my wedding without even consulting me.

View Quoted Comment Thank you so much Queen Bee.

View Quoted Comment Thank you.

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Hi Judith. I'm sorry to hear this situation. I completely agree with the previous comments. Being clear and standing your ground, given the situation, is definitely justifiable.

I agree with all PP, especially queenbee saying have somebody else present when she uninvites him. This was so out of line for her mother to do. If she is still worried about him showing up, a possible option is to have some sort of security or person who will check names at the door and make sure they match who is on the guest list (I guess like a bouncer for lack of better terms). Not sure if that's doing too much, but that's an option she can keep in mind. So sorry she's dealing with this.

I agree. The mother needs to be the one to resend the offer. She had no right at all to do such a thing. Especially if she was aware of that situation.

This was not a real invite. This is not "disinviting." Tell them he is not welcome, and if she shows up security will deal with It (don't worry about fibbing about security, let him worry).

I agree with pp, but on a another note, I would have someone from the venue/ceremony with a guest list and turn them away if they try to still come. Who knows what details the mom spilled already.

What a sick thing to do! I would tell the mother to rescind the offer or she can be uninvited as well. Who would do that to their own child?

The mom is the one who put them in the awkward situation, so I think it's only fair that the mom "uninvite" this person. It could be as simple as "the invites have already been sent out" and they'll probably get the idea they are not getting an actual invite from the bride.