Uninterested bridesmaids

In my experience 7 months out is still a little too early for other people, even bridesmaids, to be super excited and involved. I think it still feels far away to a lot of people. With that said, I understand where you are coming from when it comes to ordering the dresses. I wouldn't expect them to be super involved/excited about anything just yet, but I would just send them all one more message giving them the dress info and a date that it needs to be ordered by. After that, just leave them to it for a few months. They're adults and need to figure it out. If they don't have the dress, they can attend as a guest. Hopefully as it gets closer they will be more excited and interested!

I personally know just how disappointing this feels, but my advice is to lower expectations and don’t rely on them for excitement. I learned, as many other brides have, that no one is as excited about our wedding as we are. I blame the movies for giving us unrealistic expectations. Just try to enjoy what you can of the planning process with the few that do show interest.

Hello! I have noticed a change in a few of my bridesmaids as well since I have been engaged. It is so hurtful. My only advice to you is too just keep calm and remember that you found your other half. I keep telling myself I will get the last laugh and already know I will not be in one of my bridesmaid’s wedding. Hope this helps!

I don't like group messages. I feel like a lot of times people don't respond to group messages unless they have something to contribute besides yeah or okay. All you can do is give them the dress details and deadline for purchase. 10 bridesmaids is a lot. Expecting 10 people to be hype for an event is a lot. I know you want everyone to be excited and I'm sure they will be when the day comes! Don't stress and enjoy your wedding planning! Don't let your expectations of others ruin your wedding planning! I feel like you have an idea of what a bridesmaid should be and they're not measuring up to that expectation. They might not actually be doing anything wrong though.

You are seven months out. Many people don't even have a bridal party at this point. My suggestion is to breathe, relax, and let them be. No one will ever be as excited or focused on your wedding as you are, so it's fine. Trust me All they need to know are deadlines for things. Mention that, and then just go back to treating them like loved ones and not bridesmaids. As things get closer, the excitement will grow, I'm sure. They are (I assume) grown adults and have their own priorities - it's all good. Just breathe.

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Exactly THIS!

My wedding is four months away and none of my bridesmaids have bought a dress yet. I told them David’s Bridal, floor length, chiffon, and color is Marine. I know they will take care of it before the big day and a few of them are going with me to David’s on the 27th and getting a dress then. It’s really not a big deal, because BM dresses come in pretty fast and are usually not alteration heavy. I wouldn’t worry about that so much right now with how much time you have left. And as a PP mentioned... no one will ever be as excited about YOUR wedding than you are! Just go back to treating your BMs like friends before maids and only give them important information like preferences and deadlines. The closer the wedding becomes, the more interested and excited they will become. 😃

My bridesmaids were like that too, it felt. i try to be understanding at the same time knowing they also have a lot going on in their own lives.

but i had a convo with them saying that i felt like they weren't really paying any attention at all to me either so it would be nice if they could try a bit more despite their busy schedules.

in the end, if they're truly your friends then they'll get their act together but some people are truly not good at being bridesmaids aha. i've said this to people before - some people are better friends than bridesmaids and some people are better bridesmaids than friends. usually this just means that some people are just organized and take initiative and just like to do these kind of things.

Don't take it personally. Your wedding is your priority, not theirs. They will come around when the showers and bachelorette parties start. 7 months out from the wedding, they aren't thinking about the wedding... they are thinking about costs. Just have honest conversations with the ones who aren't being responsive. It could be that there is something going on in their lives at the moment that has their attention. These are your closest friends, just check-in with them on things not related to the wedding for a few weeks.

People have lives outside of your wedding. I have 3 bridesmaids and a MOH. My MOH has been super excited about wedding stuff this whole time, so I've talked to her a lot about it. The other BMs, I maybe talked to them 4 times about wedding stuff. I asked if anyone could go BM dress shopping (2/4 could make it), 4 months out I asked if everyone got their dress and suggested they get rose gold or yellow gold shoes (after 1 asked what kind if shoes), and then I asked if anyone was interest in hair and make up and gave them the prices. I have talked to them sometimes about other things, but very little wedding talk. You are still very far out even though I know it doesn't feel like that for you. Just set a date by which you want them to get the dress. David's Bridal dresses come in in like 2 weeks almost all the time, so you definitely have PLENTY of time. I would maybe suggest by 4 months out they order it. As the time gets nearer, they may become more excited. It isn't that they aren't happy for you (most likely), but they have their own lives and own stuff to worry about and think about. I know 1 of my girls has a kid and a husband, another just moved halfway across the country, another just got engaged, and the other is pregnant. Sooo many things to juggle, and being a bridesmaid is not the same as being the bride. I know I wasn't this subsumed in wedding plan when I've been a bridesmaid because there just isn't as much you have to do in that role.

7 months is a little early for ordering dresses. My girls just ordered theirs and we are at 5 months. I can understand how it can be frustrating when nobody responds right away. My bridesmaids did eventually. Are there really ones you have not heard from at all, even none-wedding related? It seems odd they wouldn't respond eventually. 10 is a lot of people to orchestrate for sure. I really hadn't asked my bridal party anything or discussed the dresses and bachelorette til last month. Just be stern about what needs to get done. Say this is the dress, this is the store, this is the price, the dresses should be ordered by this date. If they don't respond in a group text to confirm they "read and understand", text them individually to follow up. They won't be excited til closer to your wedding when there's a bachelorette and bridal shower in my mind!

We're at about 5 months out right now and my bridesmaids are the same way. I'm trying not to let it get to me. My one sister has been my hype man which is helpful but the other two are focused on what's going on in their lives more (both are expecting!!!)

We're supposed to shop for dresses on Saturday and two of four cannot make it. So I told them, look, just get your dress before the beginning of October or sit as a guest. No big deal to me, those who want to/ have the energy to "attend" to me on the day will do so and will be rewarded with extra tequila.

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I would agree with this completely.

I have one bridesmaid who is super involved and has gone with me to bridesmaids shopping for dresses. I would check and make sure you have a timeline for alterations as well. Many will want to get their dresses custom tailored so just remind them of that in your message as well.

I'm three months out and feel this way sometimes. So I completely understand and glad I'm not the only one. I do know that they will be there on the actual day though and be exactly what I need.