Ugh the guest list

Yeah my mom does the same thing, she just added more people a month ago...guess they don't get a save the date because I sent them in October! She just doesn't get it...

My parents are paying for the majority of my wedding so they get a say in the guest list. I would say if they are paying then they get a say. Otherwise tell her it's your wedding and you can't afford to invite so many additional guests.

This could be one of two things: 1. a mom that's overstepping her bounds and trying to be in control of the guest list or 2. a mom that's just so excited her baby is getting married she wants her entire family to be there to witness!

Trying to think the best of all around, I'm guessing she's in category 2. You definitely have a few good options here that will keep the peace much better than just telling her to buzz off. You could review the portion of the guest list with her family WITH her, and see if there are any changes/substitutions she would like to make (NOT add) or you could ask her something along the lines of "if we had X number of invitations to give to your family, who would you give them to?" This will make her feel involved in the planning process and hopefully leave her a little happier, which will leave you less stressed. Of course none of this matters if invites are already out - which should end the conversation there At the end of the day, make sure your VIP's get invites and throw your mom a bone for a handful of her picks.

I was in a similar situation with our planning! My husband and I broke it down this way: we gave his parents 50 invites, my parents 50 invites, and 50 for us. My (divorced) parents were at a bit of a crossroads here; my dad was very upset to learn my mom got about 35 of these invites while he got 15 - but when I broke it down logically: her family has 60+ (not including all that babies!) while his has 6. Once we had an actual conversation - not argument - about this and got some more understanding, everything was great moving forward. Good luck!!!

This was my grandmother. She was trying to invite all of her friends from Arizona because she recently moved here (Texas). I finally had to say "I do not know them, I am not made of money, and I will not be extending an invite to them." I got lots of push back, guilt tripping, and sad eyes but I got to the point that I didn't even care. Trying to be smart about money when it comes to my wedding doesn't make me a heartless person. Making someone feel bad about not inviting people to their wedding that they don't even know makes them inconsiderate and rude. I.e. my grandmother! You have to put your foot down or she'll steam roll right on over you. Tell her no and when she say's "If you don't invite them, X, Y, and Z won't come!" say "Less money for me to spend then."

Exactly! Stand your ground!!!