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Devoted December 2019

Two dads and i need help!

Hannah, on July 15, 2019 at 9:29 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 9

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Backstory: bio dad was an alcoholic but somewhat present in my early childhood. Around the time I was a preteen he moved out of state with my then stepmom and pretty much cut ties. He’s never been father of the year, but over the last couple years (my early twenties) he’s sobered up and been making an effort to be in my life.

When I was 11, my mom married my step dad who has been the one that’s been here to raise me and been here for all important moments and I remain closer to him.

After months of agonizing over the walking down the aisle (could not have them both because they don’t get along), I finally made the decision to have my step dad do it and told my dad he could have the first dance. He wasn’t happy but I think he understood.

Now my question is, do I do two daddy daughter dances? Is 2 too much? I don’t want the guests to get bored but I don’t think they’d want to share a song. Advice/ideas?

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9 Comments

Latest activity by Tamika, on July 16, 2019 at 12:05 PM

Legend June 2019
Melle · on July 15, 2019 at 9:35 PM
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You can do one and have one dad cut in half way through and just swap
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Dedicated March 2020
Pamela · on July 15, 2019 at 9:36 PM
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If you really want to dance with both, you could split a song or have two songs cut so you only do a couple of minutes with each.
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Savvy July 2021
Shelbi · on July 15, 2019 at 9:58 PM
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I’m having my dad and stepdad walk me down the aisle (they don’t get along either but they’re setting that aside for the wedding) they’ll likely avoid each other after. I’m also doing two dances one with each of them. My Dj told me what they usually do is you start your first dance and when you give that person a big hug it cues the Dj to switch the song and announce the next dance. He said if you try to have them do 2 minutes of each you might be in a special moment when the song gets cut or the song might be in the chorus.
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Devoted December 2019
Hannah · on July 15, 2019 at 10:10 PM
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When i brought up them both walking me they were both mad and so I finally just made a decision and I’d be lying if I said I’m completely happy with it but it was causing me way too much stress to keep worrying about it.

But thats a good idea with the hug!! I also wonder if I could tell my DJ something along the lines of fading the song after the second chorus?
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Super October 2020
Renee · on July 16, 2019 at 2:11 AM
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You could just have one announced father-daughter dance and then have a second dance for your stepdad. Just another option
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Dedicated November 2019
Lory · on July 16, 2019 at 7:16 AM
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I’m doing two, and making the songs about a minute and a half for each. They have separate songs
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Expert October 2019
Tamika · on July 16, 2019 at 9:51 AM
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I think it is a beautiful thing to have the 2 Daddy and Daughter dances; if you think it will be too long then find a song that is about 3 minutes a piece unless you have a favorite. It will be something that ppl will never forget and maybe future weddings will incorporate that as well! It takes one person to make a chance that someone is not bold enough and scared to do. Help us out!
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Devoted December 2019
Hannah · on July 16, 2019 at 11:49 AM
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Love this! You’re right! My mom told me yesterday (during a discussion about cake) that I need to stop trying to please everyone and just do what makes me happy!😊
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Expert October 2019
Tamika · on July 16, 2019 at 12:05 PM
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And you should do just THAT!!!!!! I need to be doing the same thing LOL
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