Traditions to cut

Just thought it could be a fun discussion but clearly you disagree.

I cut out most of the traditions.

I think a lot of those are for the days when the parents paid for the wedding and it was a lot for them. In our case...we are not doing the parents dances, I am walking myself down the aisle. There isn't the ring bearer and flower girl and no bridal party. It has made things MUCH easier to plan out. With cancelling out the big bridal party, the introductions are gone and no lengthy toasts. No bouquet toss or garter garbage. It is gonna be a simple ceremony and our reception will be more about a good time than all that ridiculous pomp and circumstance. Just a good time for peeps we care about most.

No broom jumping. No unity ceremony. No something borrowed etc etc. I might not have a bouquet. No groom's cake. No boutonnieres. GM won't be in full suits/tux's. I really just took out "extras"

@mozabrat I really wanted to cut the bridal party too, but he really wanted his BM. I'm thinking about leaving out the toasts and dances too, my dad and his mom have no dance skills haha

@futuremrsm I like the idea of skipping the unity ceremony. I can't find a version of it that I don't hate

@SummerP me neither! Lol. Every time I watch one I'm like, this feels so underwhelming, unless kids are involved and it's like a blended family. Then I'm like okay, that's sweet

My friend decided to walk down the aisle together with the groom. I don't think she had a good relationship with her dad so that was partly why.

What a good idea! I'll have to consider this.

I've always wanted to walk myself down the aisle because I love the symbolism of us coming together on our own and walking away together. I never liked that he walks in alone while I'm accompanied. But this is a good idea that I'm going to bookmark!

I agree that many of the "traditions" can be left out if you as a couple don't find much significance in them. We are not having a ring bearer/flower girl, won't be doing a unity ceremony, most likely won't do parent dances, I'm walking myself down the aisle, and most likely we'll be skipping garter toss. With that being said, I think it could be fun to incorporate your own traditions and keep the ones that hold significance or that you wouldn't want to miss out on. For us, those are the official introduction as a married couple at the reception, first dance, cake cutting, toasts...the main thing is that you as a couple enjoy your day and it feels special to you!

I didn't personally cut it but I recommend cutting the garter removal and toss.

I thought it would be fun to do but it was sooooooooooo awkward. I hated every second of it and the guy who caught it was one of my creepy af cousins. Unfortunately the girl who got the ring was one of my closest friends so it was awkward for a solid ten minutes. Ugh I felt horrible.

We plan on having our wedding party sit with us, instead of stand, so we will all be at the same level, and we will have them alternate order so we don't have "sides."

We are ditching the whole bouquet and garter tossing thing.

The ceremony will not be very traditional because our families are religious but we are not, so we are not following any religious traditions.

My brothers will be walking me down the aisle, and then standing up in my side (with my sister who is MOH).

We are doing oath stones in our ceremony, which I thought would be unique... but I don't think it is anymore https://celebrateintimateweddings.wordpress.com/2010/11/02/the-oathing-stone-casting-your-vows-in-stone/

No garter toss. Bouquet will go to the bride married the longest. None of the traditional dances.

I'm walking myself down the aisle. NO broom jumping,

NO ring bearer.

nothing old /borrowed No grooms cake, No assigned seating

No bride and groom side my guest can sit wherever at the ceremony.

No fancy cake so obviously no cake cutting and no garter/bouquet toss. My mom is walking me down the aisle which honestly I'm not thrilled about but it means a lot to her . My dad passed away last year but she's always wanted to walk with him and I anyway.

@elphaba she hasn't done a ceremony before, but she is a proven public speaker. We aren't religious so I didn't want a pastor. I chose her because 1) I trust her and 2) she knows the both of us incredibly well and I wanted to be married by someone who knew us both.

What are some of the issues that have come up? I want to be prepared. I'm pretty new here, only been engaged since Sept 1.

I'm finding this thread helpful in finding areas that I hadn't even thought to question why I would do it or not. I don't want to include something/spend money on it/waste precious photographer time on a tradition that doesn't mean anything to us. People poking holes in traditions helps me find areas that do and don't matter to me. Just the way my brain works is all!

That food sounds so yummy! We're having tacos, cheesecake and lots of alcohol!!

Summer, there can be problems when "friendors" take the place of hired pro's. Things you would never anticipate, and we've heard tons of them. For example, a "friendor" couple broke up, someone gets sick, gets a paid gig, friendship goes stale and etc.

I feel like a lot of weddings get overdone with wanting extraordinary everything! Working in a bridal shop I get a lot of non-traditional brides come through. A non traditional bride would probably not get a normal wedding gown, may modernize her dress with wearing a flannel over it, or dip dye her wedding dress, no set color scheme, no sit down dinner, and the vows themselves. Instead of writing very serious vows you can't take lyrics from poems, songs, etc and incorporate your own style. Sounds like fun and I love this idea!!

We had a really traditional wedding by choice. Walked down the church aisle to traditional music played by a pipe organist. We did no first look before the ceremony. It was exactly the way we wanted it, and it was perfect! However, we cut out the garter and bouquet tosses..not our style, and we didn't want to single out the few single people we had there. And my dress was ivory lace with a nude/champagne underlay, so a little of both traditional and non traditional.

We are skipping the "tosses" and special dances (only doing first dance but it will be a lip sync to our favorite Temptations song - using their choreography of course) - so no father/daughter, mother/son etc. We aren't doing toasts (although people are encouraged to record a private toast with out videographer during the cocktail hour). We are doing a handfasting and we have someone who will carry in the cord as part of our processional behind our adult ring bearer (over 21 wedding and reception) - (apparently it is common to just have it on a table or in the officiant's pocket). There may be other things but these are our "breaking rules" type things.