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Madelin
Devoted November 2020

Traditionally, does the bride pay for the bridesmaid robes?

Madelin, on September 17, 2020 at 3:09 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 26
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I really want my bridesmaids and I to wear robes on the day of the wedding (for the pictures of course). I have a bridesmaid and a maid of honor that stepped up to be a part of the bridal party when a lot of people dropped out. Money is tight, since my fiance and I are paying for basically the entire wedding ourselves, we own a home together, I work only part time because I go to school full time, and we had to get my FH a truck because we were in an accident and his car was totaled. I want to do something sweet for them but I also don't want to jeopardize myself financially. What should I do? Should I ask them to purchase their own robes? Would that be rude?

26 Comments

  • L
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa Online ·
    • Flag
    If you are requiring it, you should purchase it for them, since it's being used as a prop for your wedding photos. I wouldn't ask the bridesmaids to buy them themselves.
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  • Jana
    Rockstar October 2022
    Jana ·
    • Flag
    Anytime you dictate a look, you need to cover it for them. Find other areas to cut back on if it's that important.
    • Reply
  • Shirley
    Devoted November 2020
    Shirley ·
    • Flag

    You unfortunately can't ask them to purchase their own robes. The robes are not necessary, so I would just skip it if it would put you at financial risk. I have seen girls all wear white t-shirts and jeans, or something else matching but that everyone owns, and I think that's fine. Also, if you only have the two girls, you might be able to swing it--I have seen some very cheap robes on etsy and elsewhere. You could even go a t-shirt or pajama route and decorate them yourself to save.

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  • Madelin
    Devoted November 2020
    Madelin ·
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    Thank you! I actually have 3 bridesmaids. I can buy all 4 (myself included) for a little over $50 from shein. I really want to do it but I want to get the best deal.
    • Reply
  • Jana
    Rockstar October 2022
    Jana ·
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    Do some type of button up top instead of tshirts to avoid messing up all the hard work the beauty team did with hair/makeup
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  • Melle
    Rockstar June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    You would have to get that for them
    • Reply
  • Hanna
    Super June 2019
    Hanna ·
    • Flag

    You cannot ask them to purchase their own robes. You would need to purchase anything you want them to wear for getting ready

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  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag

    That would be extremely rude. They aren't a necessity. If you can't afford them, skip them. Don't put the expense on your friends.

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  • A
    Devoted October 2021
    Adrienne ·
    • Flag

    If you are requiring the robes, you would have to purchase them for your girls. You don't have to do the robes though, there are other options that allow for good pictures where the bride and bridesmaids are matching, like oversized hoodies and leggings, for example. You could for sure get cheap hoodies at like Walmart or someplace and just tell everyone to wear black leggings (I'm assuming most girls have these, or at least yoga pants).

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  • Madelin
    Devoted November 2020
    Madelin ·
    • Flag
    Thank you ladies! I appreciate all the advice! I am going to get them blank robes, so they can wear it even after the wedding is over. I found a great deal and coupon for shein.
    • Reply
  • Leanne
    Rockstar September 2020
    Leanne ·
    • Flag
    As the bride, I’d expect to pay for cute items like that, but hair and makeup paid for by each bridesmaid.
    • Reply
  • Madelin
    Devoted November 2020
    Madelin ·
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    I agree! I just didn't know the rules to these things.
    • Reply
  • M
    Super January 2019
    Maggie ·
    • Flag

    I agree with everyone else: these are not something you can ask your bridesmaids to purchase. It's not really because of "tradition" but just because it's your wedding, your photos, and therefore, your expense.

    That said, don't jeopardize yourself financially! Just accept you don't have any more money to spend on wedding extras and know that your pictures with your dearest friends will still be lovely without matching robes.

    • Reply
  • Arlene
    Savvy November 2020
    Arlene ·
    • Flag
    I just bought some for my bridesmaids, $10 at Amazon 😃
    • Reply
  • Kia
    Dedicated September 2021
    Kia ·
    • Flag
    If you’re requiring it, you should pay for it. Etsy has super cute ones and I got mine on sale for like $8-$11 depending on the size. Some are plus size girls so theirs were $11
    • Reply
  • Ali
    Devoted March 2021
    Ali ·
    • Flag
    I'm purchasing my two sisters who are my bridesmaids one and a personalized hanger. I didn't get them any gifts so I thought something they could use/wear more than once. I used etsy and I got a cotton one and aside from the wrinkling, I love it so much.
    • Reply
  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
    • Flag
    First check with them and see if they will pose in ro es, and what kind. Because a lot of women never will have a picture out on the web of them half dressed, or with a drink in hand, and sing bridesmaids don't traditionally all get ready together to begin with, ( that is a recent fad, along with all pro makeup), ... if they say yes to getting ready together, they may not put on robes even if you buy them. So ask before you buy. Many of the WP I have been in where most or all were getting ready together in a hotel, the bride has asked for something, all striped shirts and dark leggings, all halter sundresses that go down not up, all Hawaiian shirts and dark bottoms, all peasant blouses and full skirts, or, if people don't mind, bringing their own robes.
    Cheaper for you. There will be no half dressed BM pics on the internet issues, turning up when people apply for a job, people won't throw away robes they never wear, or cut them up for kids doll clothes. And m
    • Reply
  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
    • Flag
    Sorry. and most people own something cute and suitable.
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  • T
    Expert April 2021
    Tiger Bride ·
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    Lol I don't think a picture of people in bridesmaid/getting ready robes will "turn up when people apply for a job" and prevent anyone from getting employed...people are in robes, not their underwear. This is pretty standard fare these days.

    I'll probably do button downs but would majorly eyeroll a BM who refused to do a getting ready picture.

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  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
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    The last one I ever agreed to do, did show up at a PT job interview, as the bride annotated stuff she put on social media. Investigated because of insurance, and being bonded, in shorty robes and bare legs crossed. Years later, I still won't do them, but have yet to be in a wedding where at least one other BM/MOH has not been concerned and refused, also. For weddings that are not out of town at a Hotel or B and B, it has not been traditional for the whole group to get ready together at all, untill reality tv began to feature it. Much less doing it in just shirt tails or shorty robes.
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