Traditional wedding or destination wedding?

I don’t know much about destination weddings but you’re right in that not everyone would be able to make it

Traditional weddings can be expensive but won't be travel wise for guests. To me it comes down to what do you want? It sounds to me you want more people in attendance. I would do a destination wedding in a heart beat as those pictures and views would be awesome plus mini honeymoon.

It really depends on what the minimum guarantee is. Example, our DW resort has a minimum guarantee of 25 and we are now expecting up to 50. When we signed our contract for 25 we figured we'd probably get about 35 - 40. But because of Covid, we opted to only guarantee the 25 so we wouldn't be financially responsible for 40 if less than 25 came.

Expect a 10% decline in RSVPs unless you're us and everyone is an essential worker and looking for a vacation... LOL.. But 10% is pretty common and sometimes a 5-10% no show.

Destination weddings with all-inclusives are great if you are confident you can meet the your guarantee. The cost you were quoted seems about right, but also depends on the destination.

How many people make it really depends on your crowd I think; and whether or not you were going to have it within or outside the United States. There is always a higher guest attendance when you choose a destination within your own country. We had planned to have our destination wedding in New Orleans this fall. We only invited 50 people, and we were hoping 30 would make it. To our surprise, all 50 RSVPed yes!! We have of course postponed it until next Fall due to the pandemic, so we’ll have to reassess RSVPs then. But, if you choose a fun destination within the U.S., you may be surprised how many people want to join you! If you choose an overseas destination, I would expect a higher decline rate.

View Quoted Comment You’re right! It’s really just for close family and friends. FH does not want a traditional wedding because I have a large family and it would be mainly my side.

Destination weddings only seem to be less expensive for the couple than traditional weddings because the couple tends to invite far fewer guests to a DW. Because a DW is more expensive for guests, it’s proper etiquette for the couple to do more hosting—welcome dinner, cover transportation costs, etc. Keep that in mind.


A DW is a LOT more expensive to guests. Flight, hotel, food, transportation, taking time off work. I would estimate costs for them and take a poll before you book. I’ve declined several DW invites—unless a sibling or BFF, I couldn’t/wouldn’t spend the money.
Because a DW in our same state would have been too expensive for all our guests, we did a micro DW (15 guests), then a local reception three months later (50 guests). Best of both! That might be an option for you. A DW is an amazing wedding experience.

View Quoted Comment You’re right about that! We chose key west and so far everybody wants to go because it’s a vacation for them

View Quoted Comment You’re exactly right! That’s my fear and I don’t want people to go broke just to come to my wedding. I said 30 but FH said 50 max

View Quoted Comment Will guests fly or drive to Key West? If a drive or cheap flight, that helps. And then negotiate a hotel deal for them, and/or go off season for their rates will be cheaper. Key west will be so fun & beautiful!!

View Quoted Comment Most will be flying and my brother and his wife said they were driving

Destination weddings can work out to be cheaper for the bride and groom to host, depending on the location and offering, however they are very tedious for guests.

Most destination weddings require guests to take time off work, travel, arrange accommodation and pay for travel expenses, in addition to giving a gift if they choose to. Personally, I do not attend them because of those reasons.

At the end of the day, you need to go with what you want, but be prepared to have a number of people decline to attend. I have a friend who (prior to COVID) got married overseas and consciously did it because she had a bigggg family and she wanted an intimate wedding. Of about 150+ they would've had otherwise, they were happy to do the wedding internationally and had about 30 people attend, but that was exactly what they wanted and their vision (I will note, she gave everyone who wanted to attend about 2 years' notice so they could save for it).

It depends on what you want, what the average cost is in your area, and so on (140-200 is average cost pp in my region).

DWs are generally intimate affairs geared towards couples and guests who can take vacation time and have extra money. Right now, they are riskier, as there are travel bans and mandatory quarantines.

They generally require more lead time, as well.

Though, to be fair, it also depends on where you live! I would consider anything I have to fly to as a DW, but I live near NYC, so I expect people to come to me. I

View Quoted Comment I definitely understand! I wanted a traditional wedding but I have a huge family and it would be very expensive for me. I tried to make a guest list of 150 and it was impossible lol. He did not want a big wedding so we decided on 40-50 people in Key West ,Florida . We are in Georgia and the people that we told about it was okay with traveling there.

View Quoted Comment It was definitely cheaper! My FH wanted something intimate so we decided to do a DW in Florida with 40 guest. I wanted a big wedding but spending **** dollars was out of the plan lol

I am team DW all the way even though I am going through what I am due to COVID LOL. We decided on a DW almost instantly. We wanted something small an intimate. The destination we chose means a lot to us and we wanted to share the place with our closest friends and family. Give them some insight into a piece of our lovestory. Originally we were going to have an engagement party stateside to satisfy the majority of the family and the ceremony international. However, the way our accounts are set up we just couldn't make what would have been a 150aprx guest list work. LOL So we then decided to just send invites to everyone. That way no one feels excluded and when they called to tell us "I really can't make it" we would say awww that's ok we understand. BUT then Rona hit and when we sent out Save the Dates over half RSVP'd Yes. We almost fell out. So that plan backfired. LOL I don't recommend doing that. But even with the guest number being more than we originally planned for we are still coming out cheaper than if we decided to have the wedding here. At the end of the day its really all about what is most important to you and besides those that really love yall and can make it will do so whereever you have it. Point in case my Granny. She was the only reason we considered having a LW. It was her that said "baby if this is what you want, then I'm coming. Don't change a thang" LOL

View Quoted Comment I agree! I’m a little sad because my older close family members won’t be able to make it but my fiancé wasn’t feeling the big traditional wedding. So when I brought up having a destination wedding in Key West, he was excited and that’s what we wanted. I didn’t want to do anything he was uncomfortable with especially since this is our day. Our max is 50 even though I say 40! Lol

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I'm sorry. I know not having them there can be hard. You are absolutely right is your (as in the both of you) day. Compromise is Key and find a nice middle ground. I'm glad you were able to add a 10ppl cushion. That was smart. Best of Luck to you both.