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Larissa
Savvy February 2022

Too Soon to Start Planning Plan B?

Larissa, on July 29, 2020 at 11:24 PM Posted in Planning 1 17

My fiancé and I are planning to get married December 11th, 2021. I really don't handle uncertainty well, and planning anything during COVID has been time and a half! I was pretty jaded to start out with and it just seems to keep getting worse. I am at the point when people ask about the wedding I simply respond don't ask.

No wedding venue has any idea what they are doing. The governor hasn't set anything for weddings so they are just following restaurant rules. It seems like everyone is living day by day. That is simply not how I operate, especially for an event so meaningful, important, and expensive. Should I start planning my plan b (elopement) now? Or should I go find some hope and optimism and keep planning my dream day?

17 Comments

Latest activity by Kristi, on July 30, 2020 at 11:24 AM
  • Jasmine
    Master August 2021
    Jasmine ·
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    To keep yourself from stressing out, I'd say skip everything for now and just elope. Even if things do end up getting better by that time, you won't really know until closer to the day. It would suck to have to start now and pay towards it, possibly having to pay more if your venue costs extra to postpone like a lot of venues do. Either way it goes, even if you plan now and don't get to do it next year, you'll still have all your plans and stuff saved so when the time comes, it'll be quick to pay and have your big wedding.

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  • L
    Super October 2020
    Leslie ·
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    I’m optimistic that we would have a widely available by then. I would keep moving forward.

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  • Julie
    VIP February 2020
    Julie ·
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    I am super conservative when it comes to covid response (we opened back up way too soon, didn't force closures I all states when we should have, Etc). That being said, I think it's waaay too early to give up on your date. I'm a pessimistic person, and I'd wait at LEAST until next May or June before you even plan an elopement/plan b
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  • mrswinteriscoming
    VIP December 2021
    mrswinteriscoming ·
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    I think you'll be ok come Dec 11! We postponed our wedding from 12/12/20 to 12/12/21 just last week because of the restrictions in place at the moment.

    I think early 2021 might still be teetering on the edge of uncertainty but I am confident (and hoping!) that by the end of the year things will be a-ok! I am hoping that there will be a vaccine and all come then.

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  • K
    Savvy September 2021
    Kat ·
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    Too soon! Many brides are already postponing to end of 2021. If you think about it, there’s no way the wedding industry will shut THAT LONG. the worlds been angry enough lol! We may have to adjust to the new norm but still celebrate your magical day Smiley smile
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  • Breanna
    Savvy October 2020
    Breanna ·
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    I know exactly how you feel! When all this happened I panicked. Everybody said ‘oh by October it will all be over’ now my state is starting to shut down again, masks are mandatory, and I have family who have already said they will not come until there is a vaccine...


    I personally have just been pushing through. I am getting married until I am told I absolutely cannot! But I have the same issue when people constantly ask me about my wedding. I had to buck up and tell people the honest truth that I don’t know what’s going on and I am extremely depressed about it. I don’t even know what I want people to say, I know most are just trying to make conversation and be helpful. My family is extremely torn when it comes to covid... so that has also been stressful. What I have found helpful is that all decisions are made between my fiancé and I. I also talk with my venue constantly, everything is changing and they have the most current information. I am still not sure if my wedding is going to happen, I know it’s not going to be what I imagined it to be... but remember this.... you will not be any less in love, you will not be any less married... and you will not be any less of a person no matter the decision you make.
    I am a person who is stubborn, but if you feel a strong urge to postpone then do it. But you still have a long time, my advice would to keep waiting it out. Mine is less than 3 months away and I’m still doing the waiting game 🤷🏽‍♀️
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  • J
    Devoted September 2021
    Jay ·
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    I don't think it's too early to think about, but I wouldn't worry about concrete plans. My partner & I are currently ironing out a date for fall 2021 (late September/early October) & we've already decided what we'll do if we can't have a 150 person reception at that time. Once we have a date, we're going to get excited about it & want to just get married on that day with close family! We would get married, but move the reception to 2022 & have a vow renewal & party.

    It's been helpful to know this plan already, because we've already identified which family members we would invite to the family-only wedding (about 20), which will later make it easier to think about cutting the list further if that's needed. It also means we can ask the church about livestreaming options now, so we know if it's possible or not. For the reception venue & vendors, it means we absolutely need clear postponement policies, or a plan for how to use them for a smaller church-only wedding.

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  • Leanne
    Super September 2020
    Leanne ·
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    I would hold off on hardcore planning until the new year. But maybe lock in a venue or have a few options since lots of brides are moving to next year.
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  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
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    I definitely wouldn't give up your current date yet. If it helps you to feel a little less concerned, talk with your vendors about whether they would let you postpone if COVID is still a major threat by then, and get an idea of what the postponing process would take (would you need to put down a new deposit? Would everything transfer over? Any additional fees? Would they be willing to put a soft hold on a backup date at no cost?), but I don't think you need to be coming up with new dates or anything yet. I would wait until maybe June next year to start figuring that out if needed.
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  • Allie
    VIP November 2021
    Allie ·
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    We are getting married November 12, 2021, so fairly late in the year, and we are still planning as if everything will be better by then. However, if we can’t, we are getting married and will most likely elope in New Hampshire with just our parents and siblings. So we kind of have a plan B already but hoping for the best.
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  • Biaani
    Expert May 2021
    Biaani ·
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    We're getting married May 2021 and we're planning and staying positive. I really believe by December 2021 you'll be more than ok. Planning your wedding is a beautiful thing . . enjoy Smiley heart

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  • Kawanda
    Savvy June 2021
    Kawanda ·
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    Totally understand. I feel for the 2020 brides! My wedding is in June 2021 and started planning this year thank goodness. We were (well I had) stopped planning once Covid happened. We live in NYC so for me, I was more concerned with making sure we and our family and friends were all healthy and safe. I would say start planning. Once I got back into the swing of things from caterers to bridal shops, mentioned that some 2020 brides are just pushing their dates to 2021 so it's best to get things done now. Also, make sure on your contracts, you ask what the refund policy is so that should this still be around next year, you are not freaking out. We are also going to get married this year (virtually). Good luck.
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  • Jasmine
    Savvy June 2021
    Jasmine ·
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    I'm planning for the Summer of 2021 and I am still going about my planning as if the date and everything will be back to how it should. If we were to for some reason still be dealing with the mess come the beginning of next year then I will start reworking some things. But I'm determined to have my wedding!
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  • Milada
    Super October 2021
    Milada ·
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    We're getting married October 17, 2021 and are remaining very optimistic about everything. I'm a planner by nature so this calms me. Perhaps you could plan both Plan A & B and make it fun so that way if you have to go with either, you won't be so disappointed. Your date is pretty far out so I'd say keep being positive and cut yourself some slack Smiley smile

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  • Margaret
    Master October 2020
    Margaret ·
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    THIS - Right here.... I think you're planning way too soon. Sit back and enjoy your engagement as and things die down (and THEY WILL) then go back and focus on the planning part. You're going to make yourself sick and depressed with all things Covid and there is absolutely no reason to when your wedding is so far away.

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  • Martha
    Devoted February 2024
    Martha ·
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    Exactly, I was trying to iron out as many details as I could and it was going good but the state of the world started to bring me down. I even hashed out a plan B but I've decided to enjoy the engagement and the good times we can have. Hopefully it'll be better come the holidays and we can reopen our wedding planner binder, that's all I want for Christmas.

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  • Kristi
    Savvy June 2021
    Kristi ·
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    I completely understand how you feel!!!!! I think you are far enough out that if you have a particular location or plan in mind that you REALLY want you can relax for a while to see what happens. We made the decision TODAY to go with a plan B and elope! BUT we have both been married before and I was already anxious about planning a large ceremony prior to learning that our spot of choice (a large pavilion at our favorite campground on the lake) may or may not be available to reserve until very close to our June 2021 date. With all of the unknowns we have decided to get married in Jamaica (we had already booked our honeymoon there and the resort offers free weddings.... so why the heck not!?!) We are going to come back and do a large reception either at the pavilion or at our home. I'm super super excited!!!! I had originally suggested we just elope and it just be the two of us. I'm not an "all eyes on me" girl lol Whatever you decide to do.... make sure it's something you are sincerely going to be happy with and not just settling or making a decision from being stressed out. It's your day and you seriously have plenty of time to decide.

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