Too big family!

Start with who 100% for sure has to be there, then work your way to extended family and friends. Don't feel obligated to invite people that aren't a part of your life.

Keep in mind, with your wedding being well over a year away things may change. In 9 months of arranging (and still arranging) my guest list people have passed away, had kids, gotten divorced so it seems ever changing.

Is she helping to pay? If so she has a say, but you can stress to her that you want to keep the wedding smaller and you're concerned about where you cut it off.

My mom is one of 13 so I have a million and one cousins too. I can't name them, and I told her I didn't feel comfortable inviting them as we wanted it to feel private. FH agreed to follow suit with his family.

This is true, just gotta be assertive or else it'll feel like strangers at my wedding! I'm sorry for your loss

Bethany, I'm sure her and my dad will help pay for some of it. My finance and I are gonna pay for majority of it though

MelissaHH that's what I think too. The people my mom was talking about inviting, I don't speak with them regularly or really know them so I feel inviting them is pointless. I don't have anything against those people, I'm just not close with them. Glad my fiance and I are paying for most of it

It honestly doesn't matter who pays for it; if you've decided you don't want a giant wedding full of strangers, you put your foot down. No phone number? No invite. If you don't even know if they have a sig other? No invite.

Start from the ground up; not with a giant list you have to cut.

And don't count on money you don't have.

MelissaHH that's my thought exactly, it is silly. Celia, Good points! I don't want there to be people I barely know yet invited. Doesn't make much sense

I had the same issue when making my guest list, I ultimately narrowed it down to my relationship with people. I asked myself "have a spoken to them in the last year?" This cut out some extended family, especially the family members that don't even know my FH! I've been with my FH for 9 years, if you haven't met him, you're not invited LOL!

Unless anyone is helping to pay for the wedding, you and your SO get to choose who is invited. Start with immediate family and branch out from there. FH isn't inviting anyone from his dad's side because they aren't close.

I have the same problem! My mom comes from a family of 8 so my cousin count is well over 15ish, and some cousins on my dad's side are rednecks that I don't even talk to or see all the time. I'll still invite most of them out of etiquette, though, because you never know if someone actually WILL come (or heaven forbid actually send in their RSVP card)!

My mom did the same to me. My parents are paying for my wedding so I reminded her that we have a certain capacity for our venue and of all the extra cost involved. Both FH and I have a lot of cousins so we set the cut off at aunts and uncles. I have 1 cousin invited because we're close and she'll be there in place of her mom who recently passed away. My only other cousin invited is because she's a minor and the family lives OOS.