Tobacco-free wedding request/etiquette??

I've never heard of someone putting a sign or notice up for smoking and chewing Tabacco. It's a wedding- I'm pretty sure smoking won't be an issue unless you provide Tabacco/cigars...

View Quoted Comment Haha, you would think this’d be unnecessary, however, to some tobacco users, its just a habit they take with them everywhere… yes, even if cigars are not being provided.
Looking for helpful advice, anyone?

Honestly I don't think you can control it people use chewing tobacco. My husband's aunt smokes like a chimney and she stepped out about once every 30 minutes from our reception. Would we have rathered she not do that yes, but at the end of the day we can't control what others do.

View Quoted Comment Obvi we can’t CONTROL others… people wear what they want, but we still request a dress code… people still take out their phones, even if we request a disconnected ceremony… just wondering what others have done to make it obvious (politely), that tobacco is not welcome, to set expectations.

I don't think there is a polite way to police others' bodies. However, if your venue does not allow this inside or even outside, your guests must comply or you will be fined for damage to the property. For example, if you are in a public garden, and spitting would damage the grass/plants, I would speak to persons directly or post on your website (rather than a sign). If persons are known to spit inside (tacky), I would definitely speak with them directly. You can't stop persons from smoking outside, however. Anyone can drift away from the party space at any time.

View Quoted Comment Lol, not trying to “police” or “control” people- this is a request we wish to be made known, so people can hopefully choose to respect our wishes for the safety and comfort of everyone else in attendance… didn’t think I’d get so much push back, lol. Of course if people do this outside of the venue it’s not our business, but I guess I needed to explicitly state in my post that not only would our indoor/outdoor venues not allow smoking, we need to ensure the property and other guests health and safety are respected, and make mention somehow that there should be no tobacco use at the ceremony & reception locations, so they know ahead of time.

You can put it on your website and on the sign and some will abide. Others will still do it anyway.
We made a request about not to post photos of us on social media and a few still went ahead and did it.

As for the smoking, my stepmom was outside smoking during the anniversary dance and missed the whole thing. She and my father would’ve been the last ones on the dance floor since they’ve been married the longest. I ended up dancing with my dad cause I felt bad for him. I was annoyed at her, but it ended up being good for me and my dad.

I don't think there's a polite way to do this, other than if it's a venue requirement re: smoking. In that case, I'd make a note on the wedding website.

I don't think you can ask people not to chew tobacco. Will you be asking people not to chew gum?

View Quoted Comment Chewing gum and chewing tobacco are incredibly different… so no, I will not ask people to not chew gum, lol. But since you think them equivalent, it’s confirmed my decision to offer free gum to all guests… in hopes it’ll deter someone from wanting to chew tobacco, period. Thanks.

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Ok well hope it works out for you.

Is there an area that they can go smoke or chew at?

Maybe you can have a bubble maker to shoot people with if they are trying to do that in your reception area.

The facility where we’re getting married is a smoke free building. They have signs up both inside and out.

I should have mentioned that people get really antsy for their next smoke. So they will need a spot where they can do that (or chew tobacco). It might help to provide nicotine gum so they can get some nicotine in another fashion. It could help to have that spot figured out ahead of time for those who cannot avoid the habit for very long.

You could try to make it really generic and just say on your website: “Tobacco use is prohibited at both venues” Saying that instead of just “smoking” would also cover the chewing. That way if they absolutely insist on it, they’ll walk a bit a ways away outside to do it.


While I’m trying to understand others comments on here about “not policing others bodies” I have a sister with chronic lung disease, so I take a different view on the subject because it’s extremely detrimental to her health to even breathe second-hand smoke, so I totally get your point about not wanting to negatively impact other guests’ health.

Chewing tobacco is available in pouches. People tuck the pouch down by their gumline, and don't need to spit because the tobacco isn't loose. They could be "chewing" all night and you wouldn't know.

A lot of people use e-cigs now. If they aren't using a tobacco flavored juice, but are instead using a flavor like vanilla, ice cream, or some other flavor, they could go off into a corner or into the bathroom and it would smell like air freshener. Again, no one would know.

So, I would maybe post something on your website asking guests to please forgo tobacco products, but I don't see the point in making a huge deal about it. If they want to smoke or chew they're going to find a way. And since they're adults and are used to not be able to smoke in indoor venues, they'll likely be respectful and inconspicuous.

So our venue doesn't allow smoking indoors (no surprise) but also doesn't allow it on the outdoor terrace. They are also not allowed to smoke outside the door downstairs. As I could see this being a thought for some guests, I'm definitely going to note it somewhere, or on the wedding website. My approach is going to be that there is a permitted area across the street, should anyone need to. Among our guests, we have some close friends who I know smoke and wouldn't feel weird letting them know. They'd honestly appreciate it. So we'll probably tell them directly, so they know where they can go to have a smoke.

I think noting there is a designated area is accommodating, while also helping reduce it happening elsewhere. We also have no choice, or we'd get fined by the venue. And maybe the city.

I worked at the hotel that I had my reception at the first time, and I can tell you as someone who cleaned the outside and bathrooms, people absolutely do smoke and chew tobacco at a wedding. The venue has its own rules, such as at our hotel it wasn't allowed inside at all, and smokers had to be 25 feet from building, but people ignored it religiously, to the point where many weekends, smoke smell would get sucked into the ventilation and we had to keep telling people to move away from the building. If you have a venue with smoking/tobacco rules, you can note it somewhere on your site or invitations, but you may have a hard time enforcing it without providing a reason that most people are going to respect. Many folks are very respectful of requests, but not everyone is without being given a specific reason sadly.

I appreciate you brought this up, because I am severely allergic to cigarette smoke. I'm on injections and medications as well as drink copious amounts of caffeine which is a bronchodilator, but I have had to be put on a nebulizer before because of severe reactions. Especially if I am sick. Caused my fiancé to panic once when we had the window open and the neighbor started smoking. If our venue has no rules about it, I may put something on there asking people to go to their car or the parking lot to smoke due to severe allergies of some of the guests and wedding party.

Could I receive a catalog or free sample by mailing address. Christy fugate. 820 Riley Branch Rd. Clayhole Ky, 41317. Don't know what else to do.