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Beginner December 2020

To invite or not to invite my fh Brother

Zyrah, on March 5, 2020 at 3:39 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 8

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My FH has an older brother who has a drug problem. He has made him his best man... I wasn’t super on board with this, but will support my FH. Lately though his brother has been acting up. In the past month the family has called the police on him twice.
At this point I don’t want him in the wedding. our wedding is in 10 months though, so I don’t want to say anything right now.
I honestly don’t know how to handle the situation and my FH is scared to hurt anyone’s feelings so he is not saying anything. Also because his brother is a hot head. Help! Do I wait it out or tell the family now that if the brother doesn’t get his life together he can’t attend our wedding?

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8 Comments

Latest activity by Sherry, on March 6, 2020 at 3:22 PM

Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on March 5, 2020 at 3:41 PM
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You should leave it alone and let your FH make the decisions and decide if/when to tell his family.
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Master October 2020
Mandi · on March 5, 2020 at 3:45 PM
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This sounds like a FH problem and argument with his family. You should be supportive of FH, but don't start the convo.
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Master January 2015
null · on March 5, 2020 at 3:48 PM
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I agree with PP's, this is a decision for your FH. If he's concerned about it, he'll come to you for your opinion. All you can do is be supportive in whatever he decides.
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Expert June 2020
Pattie · on March 5, 2020 at 3:52 PM
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I agree with PPs. Its your husband's call. Be supportive regardless
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Expert October 2020
Kate · on March 5, 2020 at 4:09 PM
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I completely understand where you're coming from and I also sort of agree with PP in the sense that this is something your FH should take care of... HOWEVER, this is the biggest day of your life and if you feel someone is going to screw it up because of their bad behavior, I think you have every right to not want them there. Express your concerns to your FH and hopefully you can work it out together.
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Legend July 2019
MrsD · on March 5, 2020 at 4:13 PM
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I wouldn't even bring this up until September/November or early December. Then I'd let your fiance decide and support him. Hiring security is always an option too.
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Expert January 2021
Katie · on March 6, 2020 at 10:32 AM
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Ten months is a long time... I'd wait it out. If FH wants him there, he should be.
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Master September 2019
Sherry · on March 6, 2020 at 3:22 PM
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Your FH will have to make the decision since it is his brother. If he decides he doesn't want him there, he needs to tell him. Just be supportive of whatever decision he makes.
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