tipping your officiant?

Is your officiant a priest? rabbi? justice of the peace? I think it make a difference. I have friends who had priests and rabbis as officiants and they were expected to tip. I had a justice of the peace and his fee was only $100. He did such a good job that we ended up giving him $200, but it was because we wanted to, not because it was expected.

@ ashley, she is an ordained, non-denominational minister, found her here on WW.

My officiant refuses to let us pay her so we are getting a $50 gift card to Barnes and Noble with a nice thank you card and a $250 donation to the church

I mean absolutely no disrespect, but just curious...why do you feel the need to tip?

Our officiant's fee was $200 and that is all that we paid her. It never crossed my mind to tip her to be honest. We did however invite her to the reception ( she declined) since she knew the majority of the people there.

If it is an independent, like me, our fee is what we expect. We don't get supported by a church gig, so it is what it is. If you totally love us? Wait until afterwards when you've had a chance to experience the service to decide (I honestly think all tips should be decided AFTER the service.....).

The best tip, hands down, is a great review that lets people know what was special about the ceremony. Did they write a fabulous service? Did they answer your questions instantly and suggest cool elements for the ceremony? These are the things that other couples want to hear, and we love it when you take the time to write about them.

@ Casey....I wasn't sure if I should tip at all...I really don't know what's expected...do they come to the dinners, do we tip?...ahhh

I'm paying $330 for my independent officiant. We are not planning on paying any more than that!

We are paying our marriage commissioner $300, and that's all we're paying. It's not common here to invite them to any of the rest of the wedding (unless they're someone who'd be invited anyways), and only common to tip if they're religiously affiliated - because they typically charge far less or nothing at all. But a marriage commissioner is non denominational and independent, and they set their own fees.

No vendor (at least a good one) will expect a tip. If they do a good job you tip just like anything else. We also understand weddings aren’t cheap. For me to expect a tip is rude. Don't feel obligated to tip.

Enjoy your Day!

I agree with some of the others...you should not plan to give a tip. If they are doing your rehearsal for free then offering dinner is nice. However, if you have to pay them then I would leave it at that. If you want to feel prepared...I would buy a generic gift card that you could also use. The only reason I would tip is if they did something to go above and beyond or if you have a special relationship with them.

We are paying ours $300, found her through vendor search. She's a non denominational ordained minister. I didn't plan on tipping her. I was thinking earlier tho, do we invite her to the reception? Or does she just leave after the ceremony. We sign our paperwork and she goes? Is that awkward?

Almost everyone invites me, but I rarely stay (nor do most of my colleagues). It's not that I don't like you; it's just that I don't know anyone, I don't want you to pay for me, and very often I have something else to do. (I personally stay for a little of cocktail hour to chat with some of the guests if they want, but no one includes me in the count...)

If a family pastor/rabbi is doing your ceremony, you probably should invite them, but they may not stay either.