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Bride2B2017
Devoted August 2017

Tipping vendors, according to Martha Stewart

Bride2B2017, on May 20, 2017 at 3:08 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 19

So- according to Martha Stewart- regarding tipping your vendors, if the person at your wedding OWNS the business you do not tip. If the vendor sends employees to work at your wedding, you DO tip them. Have any of you heard of this?! Thoughts? I want to make sure I Tip accordingly, but don't want to overdo it. Thanks in advance!

19 Comments

Latest activity by Jay Farrell, on May 20, 2017 at 9:20 PM
  • Leah
    VIP July 2017
    Leah ·
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    If you think they did their job satisfactorily, you should tip them.

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  • Sarah
    Super June 2017
    Sarah ·
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    This is pretty standard tipping etiquette, wedding or any time. The reasoning is that owners are setting the prices and should be calculating expenses and profits in already, while employees, especially in service industries, are typically low hourly wage earners. That being said, it's not against etiquette to tip owners, just not required. Most people appreciate monetary thank yous for jobs well done.

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  • Svetlana
    VIP October 2018
    Svetlana ·
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    I think it makes sense.

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  • FaithD_2017
    VIP September 2017
    FaithD_2017 ·
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    I've also read some sound advice that you should wait until after the wedding is over to decide what amount you think they deserved and then send them a tip with the thank you card.

    I like that idea a lot.

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  • Steph
    Super June 2018
    Steph ·
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    I've heard of this, but I generally tip regardless of whether the person is the owner or not. I feel like if a person does a good job, they should get a tip. The only instance I may not tip for the wedding is the catering since it includes a gratuity percentage in the contract.

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  • Jay Farrell
    Jay Farrell ·
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    Martha Stewart is a complete asshole for saying something that ignorant. You're under no obligation to tip, but the "owner" factor has nothing to do with anything. It's who goes above and beyond for you and works the event.

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  • muriel
    Champion June 2018
    muriel ·
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    @Jay Farrell Photography I am surprised that a vendor would use such a choice of words. You are welcome to your opinion, but Martha Stewart is certainly not ignorant. It is, as a pp said, standard tipping etiquette.

    Traditionally, business owners don't get tipped—just their employees—but you can and should tip an owner when the service exceeds expectations. There are thousands of references online which all say the same thing.

    "Photographer and videographer:

    You're not required to tip them if they own the studio. If they don't, then giving them an extra $50 to $200 is a nice gesture. If there are two or three shooters, giving a $50 to $100 tip to each person (who doesn't own the business) is optional."

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  • N
    Master December 2016
    Nancy ·
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    Martha Stewart spent several years in jail for insider trading. She's the last person I'd take any financial advice from!

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  • muriel
    Champion June 2018
    muriel ·
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    She's not offering financial advice.

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  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    Martha has put forth some very lame ideas, and besides, her superb financial acumen got her in jail and out of most of her franchise deals. Yeah, and she is pretty ignorant if you really look at half the crap she spews out. And lest you think she is a self made success? Think again.

    Tip your owners if they did right by you. It is by no means expected, but your owner operators will go further than anyone else to make sure your wedding is perfect. They will absorb cost overruns, reorder your flowers if they don't look exactly right, rewrite you script four times, find that special song, turn you on to engagement shoot locations no one else knows about. They probably can refer you to other great pros too; we tend to travel in packs.

    Don't tip anyone who didn't merit it, owner or not, and yes, wait until the dust settles and write a note after the fact with a tip or without, depending on the actual service.

    @ Sarah? They are almost alway the last to get paid; a good, ethical employer will pay themselves before everyone else.

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  • ReneeEdward
    VIP November 2017
    ReneeEdward ·
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    Tip your vendors regardless of their title with the company!

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  • MrsMitch
    Master August 2017
    MrsMitch ·
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    I've heard of this but it sort of seems backwards to me. I would think someone that owns their own business, typically a small business , where they are responsible for all overhead costs, supplies, etc. would need the tip more than someone who is working for an employer. Either way I think you should tip no matter what.

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  • Willbewilkins
    Expert December 2017
    Willbewilkins ·
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    I've seen that a lot of places. I've also seen that you should tip in areas where I know it's not standard to tip at all, so I never know what to believe. @Celia an ethical employer will not pay themselves first. They will pay themselves last, after everyone else. A smart employer will do that just to keep his workers. I have yet to work for someone I really consider a good employer (hopefully that will change when I have my degree and have more options), but even the worst boss I've had made sure I got paid fairly even when the business was going under.

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  • Kristin
    Master January 2034
    Kristin ·
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    It would be really shitty of me to follow this advice. All of my vendors, except the venue, own their own business and they will all be working REALLY hard on my wedding day and I will be tipping them all.

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  • ToBeMrsWatson
    Super August 2017
    ToBeMrsWatson ·
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    Im a little confused.... i thought all vendors got tipped and that it was done the day of?? we were already trying to figure out who would hold/give each vendor their envelope with the tip in it on the day of, not a few days later....

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  • karen
    Master October 2017
    karen ·
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    Most books say that you do not need to tip people who own their own businesses. Does not mean they do not work hard. They quote you a price. If you are concerned about tipping, ask they before signing contract, does that include tips, then you can better compare vendors.

    If you think they do a good job, ask them where you want they want you to write a review.

    I am certain there are many men who should have been convicted of insider trading but were not.

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  • Jay Farrell
    Jay Farrell ·
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    @Muriel, Celia and Nancy have addressed my points perfectly. I stand by my statement. So I own my company. I work from home, and spend my time with clients, it's me who works with them before, on, and after their day. I may get the profit, well...because I'm not out to do a bunch of work cheaply. But I also have all the responsibility. I don't expect tips...but have never seen a couple tip one vendor and not the other. Often the DJ and other providers own their companies too. I may show up with an assistant, they're paid well and always fed. Does that mean they deserve the tip more than the DJ / owner operator, the cake maker who owns the kitchen and business, or me? It's nonsense. Martha Stewart isn't someone I'd trust either.

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  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    I have a hunch that much of that advice was written before everyone with a 'nice camera' sold themselves as a photographer, everyone's cousin could get ordained, and anyone with a computer and a speaker could call themselves a dj.

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  • Jay Farrell
    Jay Farrell ·
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    Karen....I'd be thrilled if reviews came every time, would be good enough for me. But I think the owner reference is for hands off owners, based on human logic that makes better sense. For hands on owners, the help goes home and never thinks about it again, the "owners" are still working. If you don't want to tip, that's fine. I just think the differentiation needs lots of work. Martha Stewart / Brides.com etc. are out for click bait.

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