Tip Jar??

I was at a wedding recently that had a tip jar, we didn't have cash and FH felt bad for not tipping. I reminded him that we will be tipping our bartender so our guests don't need too. However this does pose the question, if the bartender is tipped before, after or during the reception? Usually a tip is based on the quality of service received.

This is their second clause about the tip jar and the extra expected tips - to me it reads (after calming down haha) they don't pay their staff enough.

Ours put out a tip jar even though we told them we were handling tips ourselves after and not to put it out. :/ i didnt find out until the reception was nearly over. our wedding is far from the first I've heard of this happening at, too. So just be aware.

Tip jar or no, guests will tip them. I have been at exactly one wedding (in like 1200+) where a bartender refused a tip.

I am on the no tip jar bandwagon. I think it is very tacky. Yes, guests can still tip them, but leave the tip jar off of the bar.

A friend of mine is a bartender (he has a small bartending service). Every time that he posts photos, I cringe. There, larger than life, is his tip jar. He used to bring a big banner with him to weddings, with his company name and phone number on it and put his business cards out. Oy! He finally stopped doing that.

Well I'm glad I'm not alone with not wanting a tip jar! People are more than welcome to tip on their own if they so feel inclined but I don't want them feeling obligated thanks again

So not trying to hijack this thread, but the owner of my catering company is also my bartender. My catering bill includes the bartender rates. Gratuity is added onto the bill.... do I still tip? Do I tip the bartender separately? Now I'm confused lol

@C_H_A_R - if the owner of the company is the bar tender I would not tip separately just an inclusive tip for the entire bill.

The other part I just realized that bothers me about this whole thing is no other vendor has a tip jar. My caterer or DJ will both be tipped by me and will be doing more than the bar tender in my personal event.