Thinking of eloping on anniversary vaca and lavish ceremony at end of year, ok?

An elopement is an actual wedding...for some that’s all they want. I don’t see how your wedding would detract from your siblings wedding. You each get a day. A wedding isn’t a competition, nor should it be. Everyone’s wants, wishes, desires, finances are different. This leads to vastly different weddings.

As far as eloping, once you elope, your event at a later day isn’t a wedding. It now is a vow renewal or celebration of marriage. General consensus on here no bridal shower or bachelorette party as you’ll no longer be a bride to be, you’ll already be married.

As far as FH adopting your son, your son's biological father would have to sign his rights away, even after you marry FH. This is a costly and long process.

It's not unusual to have a small ceremony or elope and then have a large renewal of vows at a later date. The event in December would not be a wedding. I would probably skip the bridal shower since you won't be a bride, but others no doubt feel differently. No bachelorette either because you won't be one. Whatever you do, don't conceal your marriage from your family and friends. A lie never goes over well when they find out and they will find out sooner or later.

I wouldn't worry about your sister getting married close to your wedding.
Each is separate.
My sister got married a month ago and mine is in two months.
But expect people to compare them, even if they are years apart.
People at her wedding were asking comparison questions and I just told them we'd talk about it later. We didn't. 😉

My FH and I are eloping with his dad there because he is sick. Then in a year or two we will have a celebration/vow renewal so that we can do the big thing. I think it's a great idea if it works for you both.

View Quoted Comment Thanks, yes I know the process for adoption, couple family members did the same. I spoke to about 4 good attorneys over the years before I met my FH, and only way of getting rights stripped and never legally able to reenter his life is if im married and husband does it, with that being said that is one of the few reasons we want to just do it now, is for our own family so we can start the process of moving forward. Cost is not a factor, especially with the well being of a child, just time is a factor and that I dont want to wait and make my child suffer anymore of not being able to get a passport, and visit the places and cultures he wants to experience.

And you would think that would be the case but unfortunately it would detract, there are very opinionated and envious people in my family, with always lots to say. And these are people I see almost every day as we own a business together, and I wouldn't want to cause turmoil.

As long as you tell your guests the truth, go ahead and elope!

I would not have a bridal shower as you are not a bride; you'd be a married woman. And it would be a celebration of marriage or a vow renewal, not a wedding.

Good luck with the adoption- I was not able to even change my son's last name. My ex husband will not consent, nor will he sign his rights away. Unless you get yours to agree I doubt your fiance can adopt. I am sure a court could give consent for a passport if you have full custody, though. Adoption isn't necessary for that.

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Cost is a factor to some, it can cost thousands (not always) , tough botmslly $**** to go through this process, not everyone has that kind of money. The court will probably appoint an attorney for the child (my state does) completely separate from the parent and step parent. Some states require you to be married and living together for at least one year, before filing petition for adoption. I was advised a bit differently than you, though each case is different. I would honestly speak to an attorney regarding this, even though you have years ago. Laws change. A court order could be given so you could get passport.