Things you wish you knew before the wedding (soliciting advice!)

What I wish I would've done differently the day of:

1. I wish I wouldn't have gone last for hair and makeup. I ended up feeling rushed with the timeline and didn't totally love my hair. The makeup artist did a great job even with being on a time crunch, so no complaints there. It really did work out, but I wish I would've had time to adjust my hair a bit. I suggest going third or second to last.

2. I wish I would've chosen a different dress, too, in a way. I love my dress, but it had 3 layers of different fabric so it looked sort of wrinkled in the bodice.

3. I wish we would've chosen a venue with a per person bar. Our venue did consumption, and we spent north of 6K for our open bar alone. This equated to 10 drinks pp! We would've saved money if we had a pp price.

4. I wish we wouldn't have scheduled a day after brunch. I was SO tired when 10 am rolled around (our wedding didn't end until 1 am,) and I really just wanted to chill with DH.

Here's my dress and hair for reference:

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I wish I remembered to try sitting in my dress after it was altered. I remembered when I first put it on, but completely forgot after it was altered. I could barely sit so dinner was really uncomfortable

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Following! All great advice so far

Wow. Thank you for starting this thread. VERY interesting!

1. Certain little details don't matter. I'm talking about bridesmaids shoes, their jewelry, their hair, stuff like that. I asked my bridesmaids to wear silver shoes and I spent weeks making their jewelry and guess what? You can't really see their shoes and their bracelets are so small in pictures that you don't even notice them. Even my own shoes, in retrospect, weren't a big deal.

2. I would have liked to have gotten more photos in the photo booth

I wish I was more decisive about things. I planned and purchased things like decor early on and then ended up changing my mind closer to the day. I bought a lot of stuff I didn't use and then couldn't return.

Here's a few things that I'm SO HAPPY we did:

1. Made our wedding weather proof. It stormed like crazy the day of the wedding until 4 PM. Our ceremony was at 5, so we were lucky enough to have a beautiful ceremony with sun through the windows and photos outdoors during cocktail hour, but we had planned our first look inside, both our ceremony and reception were inside, and we had photo back up plans before the ceremony for bridesmaid photos, pictures with my parents, etc. THANK GOD because if we would've only had outdoor options, we would've been SCREWED, and they day would've been so stressful. Like there was a tornado warning and all. PLAN FOR ADVERSE WEATHER. Our photos turned out pretty well despite the storm (see below- photo of indoor first look, bridesmaid photo, and bridal photo).

2. First look. I 100% advise doing one. It totally reduced my nerves and allowed DH and I to have a private moment. It also did not take away from the walk down the aisle. Both moments were special.

3. Hired a venue with a DC. She made sure everything was taken care of, we knew exactly were to go, and made the reception 100% stress free.

4. Paid to have everything set up and broke down. No one wants the stress of decorating the day before/ day of and absolutely no one wants to spend their wedding night taking stuff down.

4. Waited a day before going on our minimoon and not traveling internationally. I highly recommend not going on your honeymoon the day after- you are so so tired. Wait until Monday! And, it's more of a personal choice, but we are waiting 7 months before going on our international 3 week honeymoon. We just wanted a week to decompress after the wedding, so I'm super glad we just went to Key West and relaxed. No passport, no stress. And, we've had time to save.

Wow great advise! Following for more...

1. I wish I had spent a little more time finding a hair/makeup artist. The one I went with just didn't understand what I wanted and it didn't translate to exactly what I wanted.

2. I wish I had gone with a different photographer. She literally moved 3 days after our wedding. You could tell she just wasn't into our wedding and she had a million excuses for why our prints were late. Our engagement pictures were awesome! Our wedding pictures I like, love a couple, but there aren't a bunch I'm super excited over.

3. I wish I had spent more time looking for dresses. I bought a dress at my first appointment. I love it and it looks great, but I wish I had at least one more appointment before I said yes.

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Things I wish I did differently:

1. I second MrsKirstenS about the day after gathering. I planned breakfast for 9am because my family is early to rise. But I desperately wanted to stay in bed with DH.

2. I wish I had remembered a couple photos to take with DH. We forgot to get a picture of our hands with the rings and little things like that.

Things I'm glad I did:

1. I'm so happy I decided to get a long veil. It looked so pretty, and it was just windy enough that it was flowing nicely on my walk.

2. I'm really glad I provided shawls and scarves. The women said they were perfect and kept them warm for the ceremony (so I was the only cold one in my sleeveless, backless dress!)

3. I'm glad I wasn't stubborn about the reception location and we moved it indoors to a quaint little cottage. It was supposed to be outside on a heated patio by the creek, but the way the weather was turning, we made the last minute decision to move it. It made for such a more intimate experience that felt more like a wedding than the outdoor location would have been.

Good point about the day-after brunch! If we do one, I will be sure to schedule it pretty late in the day.

This is an interesting thread. I think it's giving worthwhile advice. Whether it's taken by those with wedding brain or not is another story.

I went to a family wedding on Saturday (I'm actually shocked how jam packed the place was, considering the temperature and the snow falling. Even the officiant said that the couple must be very important to many, many people because he didn't expect so many people to come out on a cold, snowy January evening for a wedding -- but hey, it's well known that the family hosting is always top notch. That's what's really important ladies, the hosting. I call it the trifecta -- good food (and plenty of it), alcohol (not a cash bar), and entertainment (a professional DJ). Flowers are a luxury, upgraded linens are a luxury, a photobooth is a luxury, a videographer is a luxury...what makes a wedding a success are the happy faces and sounds of laughter coming from your guests, and getting to that point doesn't include the right kind of chair, the right BM shoes, matched jewelry, the same number of BMs as GM, a five foot centerpiece, table side service, valet parking, a coat check room, or white gloved service. They're all nice luxuries, but they don't take the place of the trifecta.

I could not tell you what kind of shoes the BMs were wearing (I assume they were silver because the dresses were dove gray with silver sequins on the bodice, but I honestly don't know), and it took me a while to remember what centerpieces were on the table (and that's my business). The chairs? I have no idea. I'd be making it up to even guess.

Remember, good food, good alcohol, and good entertainment. Do that, and you won't regret a thing that's worth regretting.

@centerpiece that's some solid advice! It's so easy to get wrapped up in having the "perfect" little details because there's sooo many beautiful staged photo spreads of receptions and weddings that it makes you feel like "I need to have that and this"

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I can tell you what I WISH you'd know; the demise of most weddings can be traced to one word.

Late.

Late MUA's, late shuttles, late guests, late BP, late couple, late guests and late ceremony. Because all your carefully orchestrated plans for the evening go kaput. You're rushed, you don't get the photos you want, your cocktail hour will be be cut short .

So make that not happen. Build in extra time, and be relaxed.

1. I don't like photos, so because of that, we didn't do engagement photos or have a second shooter. I wish we had done both, now, not because I love my photos but especially because I don't---would have been nice to sort of trial run the photographer to see if I liked--not the photos--but her style/attitude. She was great but I needed more direction, I am doing weird poses in so many photos.

2. Wish I had asked my husband to empty his pockets before the ceremony. He had his wallet and keys in his pocket and never took them out---got some pretty odd bulgy photos because of it.

3. I wish I had rented a venue with more time. I had a 3 hour rental for the ceremony garden and an hour in the bridal suite before hand and I was absolutely cramped for time. People really do rush the bride as the ceremony draws near. I didn't even have a chance to touch up my makeup or doublecheck that my dress was done correctly (it wasn't, my mom just didn't know how to lace up the back of my corset right--the back piece was on backward and not tight enough). I wish more than anything I could have kicked everyone out of the bridal room and given myself fifteen minutes just to adjust my clothes, touch up my lipstick, and BREATHE.