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Super August 2019

The Quest for Rsvps

Samantha, on June 4, 2019 at 8:12 AM Posted in Planning 0 6

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Sent out invites (now thinking this was a waste of time and money) end of April with deadline by June 1 - destination wedding needing a head count for vendors soon. I also sent STDs in January since everyone is going to need to travel in via plane or long (4+ hour) drive.

June 1 here and gone. I have exactly 4 of 28 people who have RSVPd so far. My RSVPs are online too, I checked today and no one has even looked at our wedding website! I know it’s working because those 4 RSVPd online with no problems (my parents and his best man) Is sending out a nudging reminder email with the link next week too soon after my deadline to start pressing people for their RSVP. Fiancé thinks his family is just going to show up and won’t do it regardless. I think it’s just so rude for a big event like a wedding not to let the bride and groom know if you’re coming. Ugh. 😒

Tiny gripes...
I know no one is going to be as excited for our wedding as us. But I was hoping for a little excitement..? Not even my MOH, bridesmaid or mom has reached out regarding their attire or anything wedding related. Fiancé and I are planning everything including our Bach party, and I’ve sadly given up thinking anyone would throw me a bridal shower. I’m excited for what we’re planning but kinda wishing we just eloped because the bridal feeling just isn’t there for me and so many other brides I know directly or indirectly (about 14) getting married in the next year that are so excited and people are throwing them parties and they have engagement pictures (we didn’t get any) and I can tell they are brides - so to speak. I just don’t feel that way still. There have been moments but very fleeting.
End gripe.

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6 Comments

Latest activity by MrsD, on June 4, 2019 at 5:42 PM

Master June 2019
Danielle · on June 4, 2019 at 8:20 AM
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So sorry you are going through all of that and feeling that way. I know this probably doesn't help, but myself (and from what I've seen, quite a few other brides on here) have been feeling the same way and going through the same. No one shows excitement for our wedding, I am planning everything myself, and haven't felt very bridal either. Hopefully you will get some of those good feelings closer to your date though. I am 3 1/2 weeks out, and still haven't really felt them though. Hoping I will at my bachelorette weekend coming up though.
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VIP June 2019
Formerbride · on June 4, 2019 at 8:39 AM
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I'd reach out this week. All you asked of them was to go on a website. If you can, text or email people the link. Then they can just click on it! Sorry you're feeling this way!!
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VIP June 2019
Future Mrs. K · on June 4, 2019 at 8:45 AM
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I would reach out to each person individually and let them know your RSVP date has passed and they need to go on your website to let you know if they are planning on coming or not. I would also say if you don't hear by them by x date, you will count them as a no. It may seem a little harsh but you need to be a little pushy with people when it comes to RSVPs.
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Legend June 2019
Melle · on June 4, 2019 at 12:04 PM
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People kind of assume that weddings are like any other party and it is so frustrating. we take all these measures to plan it by person and they just don't realize it sometimes.
don't be afraid to chase people down for an rsvp, you need to know and you need to know by x amount of time and that's just how it is. however, you can ask people if they need more time to figure out their schedules, then let you know.
a ton of my guests for some reason had no problem with verbally rsvping with us but i hated that because having an rsvp to refer back to is better. also, don't be surprised if people change their rsvps later
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Dedicated July 2019
Umgani · on June 4, 2019 at 2:04 PM
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I have given up on my family members officially RSVP'ing. They won't do it. I decided to save myself the stress and am having my mom help me with getting the confirmations.
Wedding planning can definitely be lonely .. part of it is wedding fatigue and I think people also think of planning a wedding as frivolous. People don't really understand how much work goes into it.
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Legend July 2019
MrsD · on June 4, 2019 at 5:42 PM
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I'm so sorry! If it makes you feel any better, we are waiting on 77 people to RSVP and our deadline is June 10. So obviously there is no way I'm hearing from all those people in the next 6 days haha!
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