The only stress about wedding planning is MY mother...anyone having the same drama???

My mom is just as bad.. First she had a hissy fit that I was having my father walk me down the aisle (they got divorced when I was 1, but I'm still rather close to him), then she tried to invite her "fiance" to our wedding when we have a very strict guest list (she knew that) and threatened to marry him, if that was what it takes to get him invited. My mom thinks it's weird that we're wearing his and hers chucks to the wedding (converses).. I truly feel your pain.

I'm just at a loss right now. That is literally the only stressor in this whole process. It's nuts.

Haha it gets better as you get closer to the day! i have a little over 2 months to go and she is refusing to get a dress unless I go dress shopping with her (she lives two hours away, and knows im working FT, school FT, and FH is traveling for work most of april.) so pleasant.

It sounds like she has a lot on her plate. Involving her in the wedding might be too much for her to handle right now.
Also, a black dress? She's not going to a funeral.

Yes, she is going through a lot, but how do I not tell her some details when she is asking specifics? After all, she is my mom, but I definitely don't devulge information to her. All things she knows about the wedding thus far, are because she's asked specific questions... It shouldn't be this nuts...

YES! everyone else has been so great and helpful, and my mom is driving me crazy! she's also going through a divorce, so I know she's stressed, but she argues or makes rude comments every time I tell her one little thing about the wedding! she was the complete opposite with my sister when she got married two years ago, I don't get it! I don't know if it's because I'm the youngest or what, but she's being a little bit of a crazy woman! I totally know what you're going through!

Simply tell her when she asks - "I'll tell you but remember its MY day. I love you but I'm not asking for your advise. If I want your opinion about something I'll ask." Then do make it a point to ask her opinion on some things - but give her choices - like, do you think I should wear pearl or diamond earrings? Make sure that all the choices are something you would approve. Sounds like she's going thru a rough time and the wedding is probably what you communicate with her about. Make her a part of the procees. And when you do speak with her - ask about what's going on with her - not just wedding talk!

And the black dresss.....maybe give her an accessory or two in your wedding colors to go with it...as a gift. Like a clutch purse, hair accessories, jewelry. Black looks very elegant but mix it up with some color.

I've had the same problem. It's really hard with my mom and a recent divorce. Anything wedding related is off topic, but then she became enraged when she found out that I was asking my dad for advice.

I think it just makes it worse that several of my friends who are also getting married are complaining that their mothers are helping to much. I'm like- I wish I had that problem!

I just wanted to say that I feel your pain!

Thanks for all the advice. I think she's just trying to focus on me instead of what's going on around her right now... So far, so good. I spoke to her yesterday and it was like nothing happened. Hard to deal with but I have no choice.

View Quoted Comment Hi Jillian, I hope your day turned out beautiful and that things worked out in the end. I’m am going through the same thing now with my Mother and can’t help but feel stressed and exhausted. Anyone have any suggestions on how to handle a controlling Mom?

We are paying for the entire wedding in NYC, so the last thing my fiancé and I need is extra stress. I always feel so guilty complaining to him about her because this is supposed to be a joyous time in our lives. Sadly she makes me feel drained when I discuss my wedding and she sometimes refers to it as ‘her wedding.’ How do I make it clear that it’s my wedding? Tips? Being the fact that she makes me feel this way, I wind up not sharing certain things with her because she can’t help make things bigger than they need to be. Primarily to feel relevant.

How can I enjoy this time in my life and not let her get to me? We have always had a somewhat difficult relationship; starting in my teens and me coming of age(and trying to find my own voice). I feel that if things continue to worsen even after the wedding, I can’t have her in my life affecting my mental health. Help? How can I control this situation now and for all?

Thank you.