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Mrs.Becca
Just Said Yes April 2022

The Jealous bridesmaid :(

Mrs.Becca, on March 4, 2022 at 1:03 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 4
My wedding is next month! I am marrying my soulmate and I chose a small circle of close friends as my wedding party. All of my friends have been supportive and then there’s one! From the beginning I’ve felt jealousy from her because her boyfriend of 4 yrs have not proposed and my fiancé proposed within 1.5 years! I didn’t take it personal at first because I understood. But things have become very toxic . She used my bridal shower as an alibi to cheat on her boyfriend, fast forward the following month gave her boyfriend an ultimatum to propose and then finally he did. Throughout my entire wedding planning process I found out she’s been divisive, trying to tell me she took credit for planning bachelorette activities all by herself and spoke negatively about another friend when that friend actually came up with ideas and spent a lot more money. Now she’s flaked on the bachelorette which was significantly well budgeted because I covered a good amount to make sure they didn’t have to spend much. Lied about having covid and not being able to go , i tried to reach out to get a refund for her by sending the test to let the people know and she said oh it’s negative now but still can’t go. And through all this she wanted to mention how her wedding planning is going now. It’s exhausting and I am not sure if I should remove her as a bridesmaid.


4 Comments

Latest activity by Jacks, on March 7, 2022 at 10:32 AM
  • Sloane
    Super May 2022
    Sloane ·
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    Yes pull the plug but conventional etiquette would say that that is rude. But I tend to defy convention and would remove her. But that’s me. Perhaps the best approach is to discuss what you have observed and how that makes you feel and see how that lands. It’s tough navigating bridesmaids world, which is why I opted to have none. Seems as if there is always one friend who gets lost in all of the bridal bliss and activities.
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  • Bird
    Super June 2021
    Bird ·
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    If I were you I would keep her as a bridesmaid and not expect her to attend your pre wedding events or expect her to act normal/reasonable. You’ll see her the day of your wedding and that’s it. I would rather avoid the drama of removing a bridesmaid and all the horrible hurt feelings and long conversations and severed relationships... as opposed to just having her there. That’s just my 2 cents tho!
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  • Samantha
    Super May 2022
    Samantha ·
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    Cheating and not being sorry is a friendship-ending move to me. So that would be an easy choice in my opinion.

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  • Jacks
    Champion November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    Do you plan to stay friends with her? Is she close to the rest of the bridal party? Would you receive drama or blow-back if you kick her out? Those are questions to consider when you're thinking of doing this.

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