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Dedicated October 2018

Telling someone they can't come

Tracy, on October 1, 2017 at 8:47 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 5

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Hello all, I plan on asking my contact person for the organization as well, but I am wondering if any of you have this experience. I mentor a little girl and her mom is super excited I am getting married. She is actually planning on making me something for my wedding gift. The problem is I don't want them to come to the reception. I plan on drinking and feel that it is super inappropriate to have the girl see me drinking. I don't know how to tell them that they will not be coming. Have any of you had an experience similar to mine? Thanks in advance!

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5 Comments

Latest activity by FutureMrsJochum, on October 2, 2017 at 1:33 AM

Master October 2017
LillyBean17 · on October 1, 2017 at 8:53 AM
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I was a Big Sister for the Big Brothers and Big sisters program. I will not be inviting my Little because I don't think it's appropriate. I had my supervisor discuss this with the family because they kept bringing it up and I felt so bad but she agreed that boundaries needed to stay in place. Hopefully your contact can help you navigate this as well.
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Super May 2018
Rachel · on October 1, 2017 at 9:06 AM
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Both what Susan and Lillybean said. Don't mention the wedding at all, and let your contact help navigate it with you.
Maybe you can do something fun with your mentee to celebrate with her? Go get your nails done together, grab a coffee together, something to make her feel special and included. Not sure how old she is, of course, but that may be a fun gesture and a wonderful bonding experience. If she asks you about the wedding, you can tell her it is mostly family that comes, but you still want to celebrate with her specifically.
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Dedicated October 2018
Tracy · on October 1, 2017 at 9:08 AM
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She is 11. She might love that idea actually!
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VIP September 2018
MrsRushinin2018 · on October 1, 2017 at 9:09 AM
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I love Rachel's idea. Take her and have mani pedis done. Let your contact break the news and stop discussing wedding plans
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Beginner August 2019
FutureMrsJochum · on October 2, 2017 at 1:33 AM
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After I got engaged a few of my coworkers made comments about how they couldn't wait to party with me at my wedding and one made a comment about wanting to officiate my wedding...I have since ceased all conversation about my wedding as my FH and I have no intention of inviting coworkers. Whenever they ask me how planning is going I just say great and change the subject.
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