Here are some of my pro/cons to taking a last name. I’m interested to hear what others are doing or have done and the reasoning behind that choice.
Pros: I like the way his name sounds with my first name, it feels like a nice way to be a united front starting a new chapter in our lives, it’s closer to the beginning of the alphabet
, IF we have kids, it’s easier, kind of a fresh start, it shuts up most people’s unsolicited criticisms since most expect me to anyway.Cons: the tradition started as a way for men to claim and show ownership over a woman. That’s not the way we (and most people) roll, so why do it? Why does a child HAVE to take the father’s last name? I’m in my mid-thirties, established in my careers (college professor as well as personal trainer and fitness instructor), and I’m known by MY name in my community. Most, yes most, of my friends are gay, and so I’ve witnessed all sorts of hyphenating, keeping their own, and choosing one last name, but it feels more equal when there’s not the whole patriarchal history and expectations behind it. And then there’s the paperwork: social security, IDs, credit cards, shopping accounts, three different professional emails with my current last name and one personal, employer forms, etc.
What did you do/are you doing, and why?
