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Just Said Yes March 2022

Stressing Out fh with Wedding Talk

Jade, on June 23, 2021 at 8:23 AM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 11
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I am out of college for summer and have been trying to find a hobby. I decided that wedding planning would be my hobby during this time. Well, it has begun backfiring.
I find all of these wonderful ideas and have begun collecting some of the more simple decor supplies but it has begun to overwhelm my partner and cause serious tension. He states that the wedding is all I talk about now and I genuinely don't mean for that to happen. I just get so excited and want to share these ideas with him. How do I still keep myself occupied while also not overwhelming conversations with only wedding related things? It's my only hobby right now so there isn't too much else to talk about, which only makes the situation worse.

11 Comments

Latest activity by Maddie, on June 30, 2021 at 4:48 PM
  • AJ
    Super October 2022
    AJ ·
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    Its tough, I'm in the same boat. Working from home, not going out much and wedding planning conversation for me is always wedding related and conversation for my FH is always school related. Still work on wedding things but be aware that it shouldn't be an every day topic even though you are excited. Is there a family member/close friend you can share things with so you don't overwhelm your fiancé with it?

    It just comes down to being conscious of conversation topics, maybe dedicate certain days of the week to wedding planning, you don't need to plan every day. Maybe you need another hobby like going out for walks or visiting restaurants you haven't been to before, watching a new TV show

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  • Richaelyn
    Devoted July 2021
    Richaelyn ·
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    Girl, I’m going through the same thing. My fiancé said that to me too. But now that our wedding is a month away, he’s okay with the constant wedding talk lol. Maybe you can try talking about wedding related things with someone else. I would suggest only bring up the big things with your fiancé. My fiancé told me he’s interested in the big things like food, venue etc. but the minor details I could do what I wanted. Most dudes don’t care about every aspect or the smaller things like most women do.
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  • Lynnie
    WeddingWire Administrator October 2016
    Lynnie ·
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    That's what these forums are here for Jade!! We never get sick of talking about wedding details!! Smiley laugh

    I think Richaelyn & AJ's advice to limit the number of wedding-related conversations you have is perfect. I can also say personally that if something is stressing me out or I feel behind (like with wedding planning) - if my husband brings it up I totally stress out!! So your fiance could be having a similar reaction!

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  • C
    Super December 2021
    Casey ·
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    Girl, yes! Message me if you want a chatting buddy!
    My FH doesn't like wedding talk at all, my mom is so not into wedding details lol, and I feel like the wedding talk bores the very small handful of friends I have lol

    How long til your date? We're roughly ~5 months out and honestly, like your story, up til now it really wasn't an issue for me. I'm suddenly at the hour of decision making time for so many things and I desperately want someone to talk about these things with! Someone to be sounding boards for one another, y'know? Share exciting details, arrival of items or finishing of projects!
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  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
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    1.) Find an additional hobby 2.) hang with friends, go out to eat and live life like normal 3.) respect your FH and stop talking about every little wedding detail with him.
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  • Rosie
    Master February 2022
    Rosie ·
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    I agree with Lynnie!

    Share with us - we never get tired of wedding things, lol! It's why we're here!

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  • J
    Judith ·
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    Take up a new hobby, one day trips and weekend specials that cost little ( mostly) and occur within 100 and 200 miles of home. Try out half of them.
    Drop wedding planning. It will be there later. I would have found a single minded wedding planning absolutely intolerable for more than a few weeks of summer.
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  • T
    Devoted July 2021
    Ty ·
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    My fiancé and I went though this in the beginning. He because so frustrated and in turn it made me sad. I was so consumed with wedding planning that it became all I talked about.


    Just try and minimize the amount of times you discuss it in a day, choose a day that is “wedding day” and talk all things wedding. I found that once I stopped talking about it, he started asking tons of questions.
    Good luck!
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  • T
    Devoted July 2021
    Ty ·
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    Same here! Congrats! It’ll be here before you know it.
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  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
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    Agreed.

    If wedding planning is your only hobby and you can't find anything else to talk about, there are other problems.

    You mention you are on summer break from college. Do you have a job? Are you going to intern somewhere to gain work experience? What are your goals and aspirations for the next semester or after college? There is always more to life than just the wedding.

    What does your fiance do? Do they work? Do they hang out with friends? What do they want to talk about that isn't weddings? Being able to not have an entirely one sided conversation with someone is a social skill, so I'm sure you can find a way to not have 24/7 be wedding planning.

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  • Maddie
    Expert February 2022
    Maddie ·
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    Dude...same. My FH didn't even want to have a wedding because he is torn about what to do with his late father's family (to invite them or not...it's a whole thing) and also because his other family is so big and he is more Americanized than many of them. He also takes my excitement for obsessing, which is frustrating - though I do obsess about things in general so it's understandable that he can't make the distinction.

    I predominantly just shared things with my mom, grandma, man of honor, aunt, and even my FMIL. I noticed once we got his mom in on the conversation and he saw how excited she was, he started to let his guard down a little and was more open to talking about the wedding - IN SHORT BURSTS and also not in the middle of an activity OR before bed.

    Honestly, the best thing to do is just share your joy with other people who are excited for you. Also share your joy here!! Hopefully your FH will come around and you can talk about small things here and there. In my experience- a lot of men can't handle too much information or do multiple things at once- their heads explode. Do not overwhelm him and he may come around.

    BUT BE EXCITED! IT'S EXCITING

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