Std/invitations- should return address be brides parents or couple?

It depends on who is doing the actual work with them (compiling met sections, creating seating chart, etc.). Traditionally, I think RSVPs were sent to the bride's parents because they were hosting, and couples didn't live together, but that doesn't seem practical anymore, even if they are footing the bill. We will put our address on ours, because we are the ones who need the information.

Well, traditionally speaking, it should be your parents house if they are listed as the hosts on the invitation and yours if you are. But there are a lot of reasons to mix that up. For instance if one of you has more reliable mail service or a bigger mail box than the other. Is your mom just better at keeping track of these things and you're doing a lot of planning at her place anyway? I wouldn't worry about being too "correct" on it if it doesn't work for you.

If the parents are hosting or paying, then it traditionally should be them but it doesnt matter.

if you're creating them, addressing them, doing the seating chart, and communicating with vendors, then it should be your address. FH and I are paying for our own wedding so everything is coming back to us.

Whoever is handling rsvps and the seating chart should probably be the return address. Our address will be the return address since we are handling everything with the wedding. Tradition may have been to have everything sent to the bride's parents, but that just wouldn't make sense in our case. They also live 7 hours away from me, and it would have been a pita to try to get all of the information I need if I had stuff sent to their house.