Starting ceremony later than invitation start time, thoughts?

3:45's probably okay. I don't like it when I have to wait longer than 10-15 min because I usually arrive early.

Your guests are adults and should be able to plan ahead. That being said, I think a little buffer is fine, but I wouldn't go any later than 3:45.

FH had asked me if we should put an earlier time on the invite rather than the ceremony start time. I told him that our friends are all adults and should be able to figure it out. We always arrive early, they can too. BUT, I do see the predicament. If you have a whole bus full of people missing, you should probably hold off, but if its just 5 people, start without them.

I am a stickler for being on time. I will put our start time on our invitation and I will start at that time come hell or high water. The only thing I can think of that would keep me from starting on time would be if one of our shuttles is late, but I will be building in a huge buffer for them to get there with plenty of time. I think people are adults and most plan to arrive early to a wedding for this very reason.

I have been to many weddings that did not start on time and was annoyed. That said, I'm kind of a pain in the ass about it, so it probably isn't as big a deal as I have made it out to be.

That being said, what does everyone think of this time sequence:

3:45 - ceremony - 40 minutes

4:20 - ceremony ends

4:30 - everyone (except family) leaves church

5:10 - 5:20 - people arrive at hotel

6:00 - cocktail hour

7:00 - dinner

Is that too big of a gap between guests arriving at the hotel and waiting for the cocktail hour to begin? This is my big concern that a 40 minute wait is too much, but given that I want to take photos at the church with family and then take photos at the beach, would that not give me enough time to do both? I feel bad people have to wait.

Is it bad to put the start time as 3:45 and come in 4:00 instead? Is 3:45 too weird of a start time?

Yeah i do think that is too big of a gap for cocktail hour. i personally think it should start right as guest are getting there.

if i were a guest i wouldnt complain ab a 15 min buffer. but thats pushing it. no longer than 15 min depending on how many people are missing. if its been 5 min and you see the majority of seats are filled then i think youre fine to start.

Well, starting 4:15 would put a lot of things behind. So do I just make a note on the invite for people to get there 15 minutes early? I think 15 minutes is important given the situation. I don't want 30 people missing from the ceremony.

My venue told me to put 11:30 on my invitations even though it starts at 12. I know everyone has a different opinion on this but I'm going to take their advice.

Ok. So ceremony starts a 4:00... tell everybody to be there 15 minutes before. As for the 30-seat bus, should I let people know to get on the bus at 3:00? It's a 30-40 minute ride. That way if someone is late, they leave at least 3:15. Ahh! This is so nerve wrecking!!

Most ceremonies dont' start late unless people let them start late, which is simply bad on all fronts. Anyone who knows me knows I'm a total late freak so I (and everyone in my area) tell our couples to send invites for 3:00 to start EXACTLY at 3:30 because everyone is late for everything.

You will also lie to the bus, and you'll give them instructions not to wait for anyone. Build in a buffer, as Ashleigh said but be prepared to start when you planned on starting, not when Aunt Mary gets there, since she's late for everything.

Most of our venues do champagne, etc before (as opposed to making them sit in their chairs for a half hour....), bring people out ten minutes before the ceremony starts, and they allow a half hour total from the ceremony beginning to end.

And be prepared to start when you want to start, when you've told your banquet hall you want to start and when your officiant thinks you're going to start. If you lose time, it will come out of your reception and that costs money. Your food may be toast, and you may be looking at overtime for musicians, photographers and the venue if it gets drastic enough.

Every adult should be able to figure out if there is traffic or not, how to get from point A to point B, and you can spread, via word of mouth, that they should allow extra time because it's a holiday.

The problem is if the bus doesn't wait for everyone, that's seats wasted and money wasted, so I'd rather have the bus wait.

Honestly, if I were a guest I would be annoyed if I showed up 15 minutes before the time stated on the invitation and waited 30 minutes because the time shown on the invitation was not the start time. People are adults and should be expected to be where they need to be when they were told to be there. Plus there's a good chance you will be delayed adding more time your guests are waiting. (DH and I were adamant that we would start on time to the point where we said anyone late would just have to wait until after the processional to enter the ceremony. Right before it was time for me to walk down the aisle, my MOH and I realized the ring bearer didn't have the rings. We looked but after 10 minutes I didn't want to waste more time looking for the rings and we "faked" the ring exchange. We found the rings later.) Edited for spelling and grammar. Sorry!

@ Tania and Jason- I realized that your ceremony time and your reception time are the same as mine and FH's. I was wondering if you could tell me what the timeline is for your day that way I could at least get an idea of what I'm doing. THanks