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Karissa
Just Said Yes October 2020

Special Needs Sister

Karissa, on January 21, 2018 at 6:10 PM Posted in Planning 0 22

Hi there!

So my darling older sister has Down Syndrome and we are very close! I want her to be a part of my wedding somehow, but my concern with having my sister as a bridesmaid is that it will be a lot for my mom to handle with alterations, hair, shoes, etc.

My wedding will not be religious in any way so bible verses and readings won't be a thing at our wedding.

Any help I could get would be so appreciated!

Here is a pic of her and I together.

Sister and ISpecial Needs Sister 1


22 Comments

Latest activity by EngineerInLove, on January 22, 2018 at 9:25 AM
  • Heather
    VIP January 2019
    Heather ·
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    I haven't looked into my ceremony, so please forgive me if none of this works out. But these are possible suggestions
    1. What if she holds your bouquet during the ceremony? You can make a big deal about handing it over to her if you would like.
    2. A poetry reading that is nothing religious, just short and sweet.
    3. If you two have a special song or dance to play during the reception with an introduction for her beforehand.

    • Reply
  • Amanda
    Master October 2018
    Amanda ·
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    Why don't you help pay for her to be bridedmaid
    • Reply
  • NinjaBride
    Super June 2018
    NinjaBride ·
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    There are many readings that are not religious! Check Pinterest.

    or have her be a bridesmaid and cover her expenses/help her with what she needs so it’s not a burden on your mother.
    • Reply
  • muriel
    Champion June 2018
    muriel ·
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    Your wedding is more than two years away. If you are concerned about your Mom's finances,can you not either plan a color palette where she could wear a dress she already owns , or perhaps could borrow a dress (maybe from you)?

    Or, buy her a dress when you see an amazing deal. There are David's Bridal bridesmaid dresses listed on Poshmark for $4 and up.

    • Reply
  • X
    Just Said Yes December 2018
    xbs ·
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    See if you can create a gofundme account and ask if people could chip in anything can. The other thing you can do is start saving up what you can in the mean time. She’s your sister and you both are very close and it would mean alot to her to be a bridemaid. Being a bridesmaid in a high honor and she deserves it. She’s beautiful by the way and may God bless her
    • Reply
  • L
    Devoted June 2019
    Laurel ·
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    My sister is currently 17 and my mom can’t really afford to pay for my sister to be a bridesmaid so I’m covering all expenses for her. Is this an option for you?
    • Reply
  • R
    Savvy August 2018
    Rosemarie ·
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    Aw so sweet! As someone who had difficulties choosing bridal party members due to many sisters on my side and my fiancé’s side and learning how meaningful it really is to people to be asked, put her in and cover the costs... it won’t be too bad and it’s more important than some of the other wedding stuff you want to spend on at the moment. Good luck and Enjoy your planning!
    • Reply
  • C
    Master July 2018
    Cuoghi ·
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    Have her be a part of your wedding. She can get ready with you correct? It would be awful to not have her be a part.
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  • Jurnee
    Expert May 2019
    Jurnee ·
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    OP, are you referring to financially, it will be alot? Or the fact that going to all those appointments could potentially be stressful for her?
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  • Red Queen
    VIP May 2018
    Red Queen ·
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    Why would anyone want to support a gofundme for someone's bridesmaid expenses? I mean, my gut reaction is just cut back elsewhere so you can have an event you can afford. People should not be paying for your wedding.

    I also suggest paying for your sister's bridesmaid expenses if you want her involved.

    • Reply
  • B
    Savvy March 2019
    Brittney ·
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    Love it! My brother is my ring bearer at my wedding! Important to go with the flow and It would be fun if you get her hair and make up done with you the day of, it you don't already plan to do that. Sister bonding is awesome!

    Special Needs Sister 2
    • Reply
  • X
    Just Said Yes December 2018
    xbs ·
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    People support gofund for many different reasons. You’d be surprised!
    I did not suggest she create a gofund for her wedding but for help toward her disabled sister’s bridesmaid outfit and other items. She stated she didnt want to put more burden financially on her mom by asking her to contribute more than what she already was doing.
    She asked for any suggestions; I only suggested.
    Before you go and shoot down people’s suggestions, i sugguest you only focus on offering her possible suggestions..
    My other suggestion was for her to possibly start saving from this moment so that she may have something saved up to help her dear sister.
    Her sister and she are very close and i believe its a high honor to be held as a bridesmaid. This privlege is wonderful and i think her sister deserves it.
    I say it doesnt hurt to ask for help when its needed. For whatever reason; Even for bridesmaid outfit if the person cant afford it but sure deserves it!!!
    • Reply
  • X
    Just Said Yes December 2018
    xbs ·
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    He’s so adorable!! God bless him and congrats on your wedding. I hope the best Smiley smile
    • Reply
  • Red Queen
    VIP May 2018
    Red Queen ·
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    You can suggest it, but I can equally point out that this suggestion is extremely rude.
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  • X
    Just Said Yes December 2018
    xbs ·
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    Ok thank you susan.
    • Reply
  • X
    Just Said Yes December 2018
    xbs ·
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    Gofund 👍🙌🏻
    • Reply
  • hannnnahhhh
    VIP May 2018
    hannnnahhhh ·
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    How about a greeter, guest book attendant, passes out programs, she can sit in the front row and hold your bouquet when needed or straighten your train if you have one, or you,her, and your mom can start saving for a bridesmaid dress for her!
    • Reply
  • Dancingonwater
    Devoted August 2018
    Dancingonwater ·
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    Not sure of wedding theme or anything really but what about these
    - she wears a special crown (flower crown or sparkly hair wrap) and holds onto the rings
    - have her as a bridesmaid but know her limits. Chose a dress based off her current dresses (many bridesmaids don’t match now)
    -have her say a toast or “blessing” at the reception
    -a special sister dance
    • Reply
  • stephanie
    Super October 2017
    stephanie ·
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    I have an uncle w DS and I assume when you say it's a lot for your mom you mean getting her ready, not the financial part.

    So my reco is don't have her as an "official" bridesmaid. Help her pick out a pretty dress ahead of time, and let her do her hair however she wants. Have her be escorted to her seat, similar to how the mothers are. So she can get the experience of walking down the aisle as part of the processional. Then she can sit with your parents during the wedding. Maybe get her a corsage or small bouquet to hold.

    Depending on her level of ability, she may not be up for standing with the bridal party the whole time or having any actual responsibilities like holding the bouquet or straightening your dress. (I assume you would know if she could handle those or not, my uncle would not have been able to.) So I would not include her during the main part of the ceremony.
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  • Karissa
    Just Said Yes October 2020
    Karissa ·
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    Its not a financial concern its a stress concern for my mom. She already will be doing and taking care of a lot I would hate to add more to her plate. I suppose I could delegate a bridesmaid to the task. Thank you for the suggestions

    • Reply

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