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Just Said Yes August 2021

Sort-of rsvp with Save the Dates?

Krystal, on April 5, 2021 at 7:40 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 6

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So I'm in kind of a weird situation. We just started planning our wedding a few weeks ago (he only technically proposed yesterday, it's a whole thing ), and we're getting married in August. I know STDs are supposed to go out 6 months before, but of course it's too late for that. I have them, just collecting addresses so we can send them out. I was thinking of putting in a little slip with a QR code so people who 100% knew they couldn't go could tell us, and so people can let us know of any food allergies/restrictions. I would indicate that a formal invitation was following. It's not so much that I want to save on invitations, but we have a very small venue, so there might be a few people that we would love to have join us if others (especially family that would have to travel) couldn't attend.

Would this be awful? Thank you!!

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6 Comments

Latest activity by Michelle, on April 6, 2021 at 1:27 PM

Master July 2019
Hannah · on April 5, 2021 at 7:46 AM
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I would just skip the save the dates at this point. Also, inviting others after you get declines is B listing and considered to be very rude.
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Master September 2019
Sarah · on April 5, 2021 at 7:48 AM
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I don’t think this would be awful but I also don’t think you’ll get a whole lot of people who will respond this early so as long as your prepared for no one to decline at this time, I think it’s okay.
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VIP May 2022
Ava · on April 5, 2021 at 8:33 AM
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I agree. I don’t see any harm in it. And I think the idea of having a QR code on the save the date is ingenious! It takes convenience to guests to a whole new level! I may have to steal this idea! LOL
And because it makes it so convenient, I think if people are completely sure they cannot make the wedding, they would be more likely to make that known right away if it is as easy as scanning a code with their cell phones (assuming your guests are tech savvy)
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VIP May 2022
Jasmine S. · on April 5, 2021 at 9:44 AM
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When it's a short engagement, a lot of people just skip save-the-dates and send invites. I recommend sending them early-ish, like in May, so people have a little time to make plans.
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VIP August 2021
Jennifer · on April 6, 2021 at 1:14 PM
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I agree, I would just send the invitations out a little earlier!
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Champion December 2022
Michelle · on April 6, 2021 at 1:27 PM
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B listing is always rude and people do find out they were last minute invites. A save the date doesn't need a reply. Many people don't know how to use QR codes so you could have many confused guests.
Send out basic save the dates at 6 months by word of mouth (text/phone/email) and invites at the standard 6-8 weeks. There is no need to send invites out earlier unless your guests are international or the venue is international.
If you really want these extra people in attendance, invite them from the start. Also cut the obligatory guests you don't want to make room them and avoid all B listing.
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