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Kari
Master May 2020

Socially Distanced Minimony Planning Help!

Kari, on May 23, 2020 at 2:39 PM Posted in Community Conversations 1 5

We're doing our minimony in just a week! Our venue is going to let us use the property, so we get to have access to the outdoor ceremony site and a covered patio area if it rains, and they will even set up some chairs for our guests who need them and a table for us so we have a place to sign our marriage license and then do cake or a champagne toast. We are still planning on doing a full wedding ceremony and reception there next year.

We want to do a first look, our vows/ceremony, a first dance, and either a champagne toast or cake cutting (or both), all at the same site. The event is just 10 people plus our dog, so we are not thinking of doing a procession at all and the ceremony will just be vows (no readings) so should be pretty short. No speeches, no meal, no drinks (other than possibly champagne/sparkling water and a slice of cake). Also, no bathrooms.

I'm struggling a little to think of a good flow of events. Because of social distancing, group size limitations, and the limited time we have, I'm not really sure how to entertain guests. We need everything to be efficient but also want our families and close friends to have a good experience. Our ceremony will be around 6pm (the minimony was a bit last minute so our officiant has other plans earlier that day), so we will only have a couple hours to do all of our photos and whatever events we want to include. The 10 people invited represent 7 different households (not including our photographer), and most guests will be there without their partners because of the circumstances.
I'm not sure how comfortable anyone will feel eating or drinking together. We don't want to force mingling, but we want guests to enjoy the experience and be glad they came.

I need help figuring out the flow, want to make sure guests know what is expected, and want make sure our event feels complete, with a start and an end and not just like fragments of wedding traditions people are used to. Obviously, it's also really important to us that everyone feels safe and has an enjoyable experience.

I'm also struggling a bit with decor and want a way to have a few pieces have a big impact, so it feels wedding like but doesn't take all day to set up or break down. We'll have an arbor to work with, and a table and some chairs, and then just outdoor space.

Help!

5 Comments

  • J
    Master October 2022
    Jana ·
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    Without knowing how much time you have there, dessert and mingling sounds fine for entertainment given the circumstances. The only alternative might be to go to someone's home if you want to spend longer together.
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  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
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    I'm thinking 2 hours max, and probably of that time not more than an hour actually spent with our guests. Sunset is at 8:20 technically, but we scouted out the site yesterday and found the sun going behind the trees by 7:40pm at the hillside ceremony site. I honestly don't know how comfortable people will feel mingling anyway - I know my FH's parents are really not even all that comfortable leaving their home and have said they won't hug us or anything, so would feel even less comfortable at someone else's home. Our friends will probably be fine grabbing a drink and chatting at a distance.

    After the ceremony, do we do our dance first, or champagne and cake?

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  • J
    Master October 2022
    Jana ·
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    You've done your part by inviting them and providing them with what you can. After that, having a good time is up to them.


    Have your reception in whatever order flows most natural. There's no right or wrong.
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  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
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    Thanks that makes me feel better. Maybe we'll just go with whatever feels right in the moment and not worry about the details and order so much. Thank you so much!

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  • VIP August 2020
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    I would come up with a plan ahead of time, but give yourself permission to change it if you want to in the moment. Having to make a decision at the last minute can be stressful. For decorations, if you're working with a florist, see if they have any recommendations based on your plans and pictures of the space.
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