so doesn't want to attend friend's wedding

He doesn't have to go.

There's nothing wrong with him not attending if he doesn't want to.

It's always OK to politely decline an invitation. That said, I can see how you might want to try to convince him to go if you want to attend with him.

I mean, your FH is an adult and doesn’t need to go to parties that he doesn’t want to, and you don’t need to attend every event together just because you’re married. An invitation is just that— an invite, not an obligation.
But....your opinion does matter too. He’s not obligated to go. But if it’s important to YOU that he consider going, that’s a conversation that you need to have. There have been some events where i am perfectly happy to go solo , and sometimes there are events that I might not want to attend if I don’t have him there with me. Sometimes it’s important to ME that he make the effort to attend the event, even in scenarios where I’m sure it doesn’t make much difference to the hosts whether he’s there or not, so him coming even though it’s not exactly his crowd or scene or whatever is just a nice thing that he’s doing really for my benefit. So, socially, no he’s absolutely not obligated to go , even if you attend. But whether you’re okay with that is also absolutely up to you. It’s fair for him to say “is it okay if I don’t go” and it’s fair for you to say “actually it’s really important to me to have you there” — so I do think that is an important distinction. It’s up to you guys together, but it’s not a societal obligation

My fiance went to his cousin's wedding last August and I chose not to go with him. I didn't feel comfortable going but I encouraged him to attend, so he went with his mom and his siblings, etc. Very small intimate wedding. I don't regret it at all, and he fully understood why.

That is fine. I have attended various weddings alone because men only like other weddings so much. Mine mostly will go if he really knows the person. Recently he started going to others but that is not his element.

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Agree with this 100%!

I think it’s a little petty of him not to go if the only reason is that he doesn’t know her well enough, but ultimately no he doesn’t have to. I would definitely be annoyed though.

I don't take my husband anywhere (well, almost anywhere ). He'd be miserable and uncomfortable and I'd be too busy worried about him to have a good time. So, he stays home, I go, and everyone is happy!

This is something you both will need to discuss which hopefully does not lead to an argument. I am sure there are plenty events hosted by friends that my fiancé does not want to attend - but part of a marriage is starting a partnership as one. Why start doing things separate now? Part of being in a relationship is being able to be with someone who helps you to step outside your comfort zone. If his fear is he won’t know anyone then - then this will give him an opportunity to meet new friends. If he feels like this is a personal event and not appropriate for acquaintances - hopefully he will acknowledge that you have been friends with the bride for quite some time, and that for you having him as a plus one matters. Though I have seen people come to weddings alone when they are married -it really depends on the couple. Nonetheless, my opinion should not matter since it’s you and your fiancés relationship. I hope this helps!

I've gone to weddings where a guests SO can't attend because of "prior commitments".

He doesn't have to go. You can go alone if you want to.

So, it’s okay for you to go to an event with him for his “people”, but he can’t go with you to help support your “people”?

🤔

DH will also state that he doesn’t want to go to an event, but I also specify if I really need/want him to attend.

It seems a little dramatic for him not to go. My husband (when he was my boyfriend or fiance) went to my cousin's wedding (he had never met them or a lot of that family), one of my best friend's weddings (he knew her but none of the other guests - we lived in another state - I was a bridesmaid). I'd be annoyed if my husband didn't want to go to a wedding with me just because he didn't know everyone super well.

In one sense, he's a grown man and can make his own decisions. If he gets really bad anxiety or if it's going to make it worse for you, I say it's good to go alone.

If he's just being a baby, however, he should go.

My husband gets pretty socially anxious, and we went to my friend's wedding in 2018 he had a fairly bad experience (and this is kind of a mutual friend, too). However, if it were a family member I'd expect him to go. I have a few friends who still aren't married and when the time comes, I'll debate how to handle it with him. Sometimes it really is more fun to go without them.