Has anyone felt just so incredibly disappointed after thier wedding? Not with the marriage, only with the wedding..?
I consider myself to be a nice person.. if the 6 weddings I've been invited to I've attended 4 in the last 2 years.. each time purchasing the best gift I could afford, often times spending a minimum of $100, on the gift alone.. then the outfit and travel expenses. I've got a huge family with more then 80 cousins and 15 aunts and uncles. No ones ever voiced a problem with me except my mother (for those continuing to follow, yes mama drama is still happening). I've gone to every wedding baby and bridal shower I've been invited to. I've gone out of my way to help people volunteering my free time to pick up thier shifts or get them from the air port or be with them when they were having a hard time helping them move or a emergency girls day after. Break up... if i cant attend an event i always send a gift... I try to be the good person..
Yes I had a non traditional wedding. But everyone told me to plan whatever I want because I'm the bride so whatever makes me happy. I had 2 wedding showers, the ceremony, and the reception. My work friends planned a shower in one location and my bridesmaids planned another 2 hours away. My ceremony an elopement on a different day then the reception.
The wedding shower planned by my bridesmaids was perfect, not a lot of people came but those that did had a great time. My MOH did tell everyone not to bring gifts though... The coworker shower was horrible.. the ones that planned it bailed 2 weeks before, 10 people had RSVP'D so I and my bridesmaids took over so they wouldn't feel out.. none of them knew that the host had changed... the day of I paid the venue and food and guess what. Literally NOONE came. Just the hosts.
The ceremony was fine. Bottom line is I married my best friend but the hair stylist was 45 mins late, didnt fo what we agreed on during the trial and by the time she finished I had 10 mins to get across town to makeup. My curls were falling out before the ceremony started. My mom came, woohoo!!! She was negative and rude making snide comments the whole time but she came. The pictures were pretty good. Not what was discussed but pretty.
The reception... everyone that agreed to help set up showed up late if at all.. so i had to help them set up to get it done in time.. so I didnt get my hair or makeup done. Also I didnt get around to getting my dress on till 3 people had already showed up. Then it starts raining. I love the rain so that didnt phase me... but my husbands suit got soaked so he didn't get dressed and my bridesmaids didn't wanna get changed donuts just me in a dress and everyone's in blue jeans.. over 30 people RSVP'D and more then 10 others stated a desire to attend. This number excludes wedding party, and immediate family. Who shows up? 5 people. 1 cousin and 3 coworkers. I have covered areas and tons of tables and benches and music loud enough that we had to turn it down to hear each other. I had tons of food and drinks... I ended up throwing away half my wedding cake.. oh right my cake... my mother in law is gonna pick up the top tier to my cake, my sister is making the other tiers.. I tell my MIL it's a 5 inch cake about 5 inches tall. She shows up with a cake that's probably 8 inches in diameter on the bottom and 3 inches on the top.. I could have made that work but no the damn thing was leaning so bad that I ended up chopping it in half just so it wouldn't break. Anyone who knows red velvet can imagine what happened next.. I try to fix the frosting and end up with what my MOH called a period cake.. she fixed it thank god... anyway.. threw half of my wedding cake away sent guests home with TONS of food and snacks and drinks it's been a month and a half and I still have stuff in my freezer and like 4 cases of beverages. The 8 people who asked me to RSVP for a place to stay didn't show up, so I could just cancel right? No the place updated thier cancelation policy and I missed the window by 21 days. I didnt know till the week before!?!?! I didnt have a chance. So yeah I get that out of pocket. I asked told guests not to feel obligated to get gifts if attending the reception because it was going to be a 1.5 drive minimum.
During the planning process I was told repeatedly to make a registry even though I asked for no gift for the reception because I was still having a shower and those that didnt attend would still want to send something. So I poured over the registry.. trying to make sure it was equal.. not too many big ticket items and not to many cheap things I didnt actually need. I was told to jot buy things for the kitchen because my whole family cooks and I would "for sure get things for the kitchen". Yes we live togther but it's all cheap Walmart utencils.. everyone knows I focused on paying off student loans instead of house stuff. I thought I could shop off my registry after the wedding guests were done...
Let's break it down:
Emotionally: of the 125 invites I sent less then 10 people showed up for a summer wedding. Must not be very loved. All family weddings I went to saw them open expensive kitchen gadgets and I got decorative pillows and the "well you make good money" or " you already live togther I thought you just wanted to update your stuff"
Financial: lost a TON of money. No one expects to make money during a wedding.. there is a whole industry for it haha but seriously didnt expect to loose that much.. and having to do a whole shower and have no one show...
Materialistic: except decorative pillows nothing of actual importance off my registry was bought...
After I got back from my honeymoon I got 3 invites to family events with links to thier registry or potluck requests.. and I'm filled with such a furious indignation... why should I go to your birthday bash that happens every year if you didnt come to my wedding. Why would I send a gift if you didnt. Who cares about your BBQ...
Is this just me? I feel like such a miserable excuse for a human..
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