Small intimate wedding ceremony

Yes. Both my FH and I have large families. I (moreso than my FH) wanted a smaller wedding. I was perfectly fine with just inviting our parents, siblings and spouses, nieces and nephews. But FH feels obligated to invite his large Italian Catholic family because it's what's expected. So, low and behold, we're having a larger wedding. The compromise is that we're not having it in the church. I didn't want a church wedding and FH fine with that even though his Mom expects that we would.

I think fewer people will be offended by a smaller wedding than by a larger one. It's hard to argue with, "We're including only immediate family." It's harder to justify, "We invited 300 people, but you still didn't make the cut."

Well thank you all for the advice! I appreciate it

I had the same issue and I told family members straight up. We are not close like that, we are more acquaintances than family. I mean we don't reach out to each other and our interaction is on Facebook liking posts. I think they got mad at first but then understood and now we have better relationships for it.

We love our intimate weddings, and 2d is right in what she said. Tiny weddings are very easy for others to understand; 300 people but you're not on the list....less so.

No one is obligated to invite anyone they don't really want to have there, tradition or not. Your wedding is not a family reunion. If one side wants to invite every relative they have, distant or not, let them throw a big expensive party. Celebrate your wedding with the people you are the closest to.

There are ways to accommodate by having a bbq at local park a few months after the fact, but don't feel pressured! I know many women who regret having a big wedding for other people but none for doing the small one they wanted.