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Super August 2017

Small 40 guest wedding help

FutureMrsAF, on January 29, 2017 at 7:37 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 6

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So FH and I are limiting our wedding to 40-50 people, it's very important to us to only have those closest to us there and also it makes more sense financially as we are buying a house and I am buying a new car this year as well. I'm frustrated with my guest list, because of course, people's SO's get an invite because it would be rude not to invite them. But it means having to cut family members I would have liked there to accommodate people I barely know. Any other brides with a smaller wedding have this issue? I don't particularly want to up the guest list, as it kind of defeats the purpose of having a smaller wedding in order to save money and still properly host everyone. It's making me want to be like F the wedding let's elope! But I know I'd regret not having family there.

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6 Comments

Latest activity by SuYa, on January 30, 2017 at 1:22 PM

Master November 2017
Miami2NorthernVA · on January 29, 2017 at 7:50 PM
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There isn't much you can do. You have to invite the SO. We are having a small 25-30 person wedding. We realize that some of those people may have SO by the time we send out invites. I would just say to invite the people that you really want there. We will have friends that aren't invited and that is just how it has to be.
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Master December 2016
Elizabeth · on January 29, 2017 at 7:51 PM
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Not sure what you need help with. You have to invite significant others (and plan for every single guest to possibly be in a relationship by the time you send out invitations). You could elope, but you said you'd regret that, so that doesn't seem to be an option. Your only other option is to postpone the wedding so you can afford to invite everyone you want.
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Super August 2017
FutureMrsAF · on January 29, 2017 at 8:02 PM
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And that's kind of what I figured, all the advice. The reason I'm not super close with their SO's is because they live out of state so I have never met their partners :/
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Master May 2017
JerseyGirl · on January 29, 2017 at 8:32 PM
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We started with 50 and are up to 60 for SO's. Would recommend, if you haven't already, start with those closest to you and their SO's and work your way out from there.
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Master June 2017
Anne · on January 29, 2017 at 8:33 PM
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I feel you. A coworker of mine has been in a semi serious relationship so I am inviting him and his SO. He came to me last week and told me he was breaking up with her and all I could think was yay! One less person.
Our ceremony venue pricing is based on 35, 40, 50, 70 people. They advised us to book low and add up if necessary because they would not let us go down in size.
I am at 27 VIPs, 36 with some possibilities, and 69 on the total guest list if we choose to invite that many. We aren't sending invites until March because it's a DW. We are hoping that most will not want to make the trek to the event. Pretty sad when you get to the point where you want people to decline.
I would elope in a heartbeat but FH wants our loved ones to be present.
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Master April 2017
SuYa · on January 30, 2017 at 1:22 PM
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They are a social unit, you can not invite one without inviting the other. You need to cut your guest list or rethink your budget. Maybe cut unnecessary items like favors, cake topper, less flowers, etc. My guest list started at 50 and we are now up to 65 with plus ones. We re-budgeted for 70 guests, just in case.
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