Siblings in Wedding Party

Have you already asked people to be in your wedding party? Maybe instead of them being a groomsman they can be ushers so they have some sort of part in the wedding.

Yes, we've already asked although I'm not sure that they even realize. I might look into them being ushers...we aren't getting married at a church so I'm just not clear on exactly what they would do on that day haha. I guess I need to keep researching!

I had my younger brother and Hs stepbrother as ushers. They got a suit like the groomsmen which was good for family pictures and got to participate in all the bridal party happenings and also got gifts. They basically greeted people and were done for the day, though Hs stepbrother went above and beyond with pics and video.

Maybe have then hand out programs or just point people in the right direction and assist in anything else needed.

Could they be ushers?

I have to be honest with u..im having my 2 sisters, FH sister and his 2 brothers and my brother in my wedding so it's just immediate family in my wedding..I'm close with my sisters but not my lil brother (who's 23 and acts like his 10) anyways..he's still my brother and I'd regret not having him even tho he may do something stupid at my wedding..it's up to u..but I will say that I noticed u mentioned that ur kinda regretting not having them in ur wedding already..so if u feel that way already than I think u should have them..plus ur not getting married till September so it's far away still.. and they are men they won't take it too much to heart that u didn't ask them right away lol

@Leann I agree with you they probably won't care haha...if it was only one brother I would 100% have him but I just don't like the idea of asking FH to have 2 additional people. My youngest brother has social anxiety among other things so that's one of the reasons I haven't included him so far (my parents also think it is a bad idea to ask him to do anything). So I feel funny asking one brother but not both if that makes sense? That's what I am currently caught up on...

@everyone else sounds like ushers may be the way to go!

I have a younger sister, someone recently tried to convince me she should be in the BP...not a chance in hell. When i stated she wouldn’t even be invited, neither would my grandmother, I apparently am the worst sister/granddaughter ever... oh well.

Don’t feel guilty for choosing who YOU want in your bridal party. You don’t have to invite them to be in it merely because they’re family.

If your younger brother has social anxiety an usher would NOT be a good job for him. They traditionally greet people and escort all females to their seats (so that people are escorted, and so extra seats aren't left between people). That is not a good job to have to be arm in arm with strangers and ideally making light chit chat with them if he has social anxiety. Honestly a groomsman would be better, he really doesn't have to talk to strangers in that position, but I understand not wanting him to be that either. If it makes you feel better, I have an older brother, but we aren't very close and since my FH and I have lived in different states than my brother has for our whole relationship, by FH doesn't know him well either so he isn't a groomsman. And FH's sister isn't a bridesmaid for the same reason.

Could your younger brother have the task of escorting a VIP that he does know? like an aunt or grandmother? That would be a special role, but not too much pressure. My brother is escorting my mom.

I think the right choice is really dependent on your situation. If you would like to have your younger brother in the party, it isn't too late to ask but you may get push back for not asking the other. If there is a reason you aren't close (you had a fight/ falling out), he might not be surprised but if you just generally get along, he may be hurt. I know it's not helpful advice but do what feels right to you.

If your younger brother has social anxiety, you could always ask him what he would be most comfortable with.

DH's brothers were ushers and escorted the Grandmothers and Mothers to their seats at the start of the ceremony. You don't have to have your wedding in a church to have ushers. Ours was at a winery and it worked just fine!