Sibling rivalry

Yeah….your daughter is over-reacting. She gets a day. Why does it matter if he gets married before she does?

She's definitely over reacting. He's eloping quietly to not overshadow her day several months later. It sounds to me like she's jealous of something.

Thank you! That is how I looked at it and my husband as well.

I think she would prefer you to listen to her and not call her a misogynistic word. Give her time and let her figure out how to deal with her feelings like a grownup.

The daughter is basically confused in that situation. Your son already married before she did. This is a second marriage for him, not his first. The other thing that seems to happen often enough is that when one sibling is engaged, another sibling gets inspired to do so -- even apart from any envy or competition. Hopefully, your daughter will see this as an endorsement of her engagement rather than a competition.

Yeah she doesn’t get to make her siblings life stop for hers. She gets her DAY. That’s it

Your daughter is obviously very much in her feelings (and yes, she is over-reacting). Since talking sense into her isn’t working, I would instead try appealing to her in a different way. She obviously feels that her brother getting married before her is going to somehow upstage her. So maybe play into that and ask her if she would really want to get married first. Her day would come and go, then everyone would be immediately excited and talking about her brothers wedding. In all probability, her brothers wedding would likely be the hot topic for everybody at her reception! (are you guys ready to do this in a few months? Do you guys have everything planned? What does your dress look like? , etc etc). Play up the fact that if she goes second, everyone will be present and focused on her wedding.

She doesn't own the whole year. She needs to be grateful for what she has, and learn to feel happy for other people.

She is the one that decided to have a long engagement. However, planning a wedding is very stressful so I would give her a little slack. But yeah, your son is not in the wrong.