Should We Postpone our Wedding?

Sorry that you’re going through so much. I’d postpone, only so you can enjoy your wedding planning and wedding day. It’s supposed to be a good experience for you and your FH. It will be worth the wait, so you can have the wedding you want. It will go by fast. Good luck 💕

I'm sorry to hear about your job, but congrats on finding a new one! Have you already made deposits on anything? If so, are you willing to forfeit them? Only you and your FS know what will work for you financially. I'm all for postponing the wedding if that's what is best for your finances and your relationship. Wedding planning is already stressful, no need to make it worse by attempting to plan a wedding that you can't afford right now. Your FS will always be there, so take time to save money for the wedding that you want.

Thank you yes we already made deposits gonna see if we can just change the date for a year out. To give us extra time.

Unless you have areas of the wedding you can and don't mind cutting to lower the cost for you. I'd say postpone! We've postponed once so I definitely understand not wanting to do it a second time but if it would make you less stressed I say go for it.

My advise on this one comes in 3 parts.

1. You should postpone.

Now that you read those words what was your gut reaction to them? Did the voice inside your mind sigh, yell, cry, say thank God?

Your gut reactions are devoid of all the buts. But money. But the other weddings. But whatever else. Without the buts getting all up in the way, how would you honestly feel about pushing the date again?

Now put a pin in that, cause here comes part deux.

2. Nail down the wedding you want

It's really hard to give any in depth advice without knowing the extent of the financial situation or your actual wedding desires. For example, are you looking for the whole shebang? Do you just want something memorable but are open to stepping outside the box? Do you simply wanna walk away married?

Destination weddings are cheaper than big formal affairs. I've seen some truly glorious backyard weddings too that were a fraction of the cost of hotel ballroom weddings that by comparison looked shabby and weren't all that much fun. Decide between the two of ya (If you haven't already) what kind of wedding you want and what (if anything) you'd be able to do without.

And finally...

3. Just do it

Weddings are a bit like babies, if you wait till you have enough money to do it, you may never do it. Obviously if you're hand to mouth broke, this is bad advice, so grain of salt, but idk if you're really strapped or just worried it won't be as nice as it would have been with your previous salary backing it. Life changes and fortunes change and prices go up. Plan smart. Find ways to have the wedding you want without the price tag you fear. Pick a theme that lends itself to a lower cost. Mine the dollar tree for cheap centerpieces. Use silk flowers. Or daisies. Or 1000 paper cranes. Do a sunset ceremony at a local beach, since it's spring it'll be relatively easy to get it to yourself. Maybe that's not your bag. But you get the gist.

Hope that helps a little, good luck!

I say the ceremony is for everyone else ... Typically the people not paying . ..if you can't afford it now ... And you really want to get married and not postpone... Just go to the courthouse... It's cheap , it's quick and all that matters in the end is you marry the guy of your dreams ... Have a formal wedding later ... Maybe for like your 2 or even 5 year anniversary

I would absolutely go ahead and postpone. You want to be able to enjoy the process and not feel like youre missing out on certain aspects of the wedding because you had to drastically cut the budget. Taking the time to save up some more will really help you achieve your dream wedding and not have any regrets along the way.

View Quoted Comment This is excellent advice.

View Quoted Comment Agreed. Excellent advice.

Hi Brenda! I’m sorry to hear about your situation. If you both strongly feel next year isn’t a good time for you all to have the wedding you have envisioned, then I would postpone it. You should feel confident in your wedding planning since it entails a lot attention, so if you feel like you need additional time to gather things, it is okay to postpone. Don’t worry; everything will work out. Best wishes.

I'm so sorry that you are going through this. I would say if you would like to still get married in 2019 maybe you could do a small church ceremony than have your reception at your local vfw or fire hall. They are usually very affordable and a lot of times you can bring in your own food.

So there are a few things that come to mind. I personally would not postpone, even if you just had a much smaller wedding, or something like that, however everyone is different, so you got to think what you want, and if postponing will get you there then yes I would.

I think you answered your own question. If you can’t afford the wedding right now, proponents it. You will enjoy the planning and the wedding a whole lot more without the added financial stress. Trust me, you have your whole life to be married.

I know exactly where you are coming from. My FH and I wanted to get married in 2019 but due to us deciding to move from GA to NH to be with my family we will have to get new jobs that will not allow us an immediate budget for what we would like to do. We have decided to postpone to 2020 so that even if it does end up being a minimal budget wedding we are not pressed for funds.

View Quoted Comment Great advice!
I'll add two things.
1. The guest list can have a major impact on the cost. I would revaluate how many people you can afford to invite with what you already have booked and see if the numbers work out. Hint: It's easier to just start the guest list over and build up than to look at who's already on it and try to cut people.
2. There's nothing wrong with having a court house wedding or intimate elopement and a larger vow renewal later if your venue will let you push your date back. We were the only two invited to Vegas for our friends' wedding and they had a vow renewal a year later. Everyone was fine with it and understood their reason for doing it that way.

View Quoted Comment

This is great advice. And OP, I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through this. Wishing you all the best!

What does your FH and budget say? I lost my job but found another as well. WE are committed to our date and our budget. and it's all working itself out.

View Quoted Comment Yes we moved in February from California to Oregon so it’s been allot. I just have to see if we can actually postpone it since we already put deposits down for our date.

View Quoted Comment He thinks we should postpone it cause funds have been really tight in just his check. Been out of work since April. Just got a job but the pay is significantly less.

You have to go by the budget,can you still look for a job while you have this one,that do what I am doing.